Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?If people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job that would be more satisfying.

Essay topics:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
If people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job that would be more satisfying.

Submitted by vida00 on Sat, 04/20/2019 - 14:28

It is evident that we are surrounded by a plethora of occupations like doctors, engineers, managers. Since the dawn of humanity, jobs have been one of the critical things that indicate a person's success. When it comes to this point, people have some debates as to whether people should take a secure job right away they have it, or it is better to wait for a more satisfying job. I personally agree with the latter group, and it what follows, two reasons will be discussed to shed light on this idea.
First and foremost, it is more secure to have a more satisfying job. It is incontrovertibly axiomatic that enthusiasm plays a vital role in a person's effort. To explain, it is psychologically approved that when a person is not interested in doing something, as time goes by, s/he will have a change of heart about doing that. As a consequence, the boss or the manager monitor her or him and figure out, that person is not an efficient employee. Therefore, that person will be fired. According to a research conducted by plenty of Ph.D. students at John Hopkins University, the majority of employees, which were laid off during inflation, were doing a job that they did not like that. This reveals that have a satisfying job decrease the possibility of getting fire when a harmful condition occurs for the businesses.
As a second noteworthy reason to mention about having a more satisfying job even with waiting a lot is that one is more able to flourish in his or her career. A person knows the value of their current position which has its root in the hardship confronted for achieving it. As a consequence, the boss or the manager can track his or her trying and consider that person as a diligent individual. Thereupon, one can move up the ladder sooner and easier. Take, for instance, a 22-year-old man who has joined the staff of a marketing department recently. Not only did he tried so hard to get this job but also he managed to carve a niche for himself as a marketing manager since he was 18 years old. Thus, his eagerness about this job leads him to work harder and harder. Therefore he is promoted soon because his boss monitored him and offered him that promotion to save him in his company.
In sum, the analysis of the aforementioned ideas brings us to this point that as far as I am concerned, the advantages of having a more satisfying job substantially overweight those of the accepting a secure job imidieatly. Not only is it more secure but also one is able to move up the ladder sooner and easier. Thus, I personally hope that having a secure job take priority over other things in any mind.

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Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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Independent TOEFL Writing

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 188, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
... of the critical things that indicate a persons success. When it comes to this point, p...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 259, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
...to this point, people have some debates as to whether people should take a secure job right a...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 143, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...that enthusiasm plays a vital role in a persons effort. To explain, it is psychological...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 521, Rule ID: LOTS_OF_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun Ph seems to be countable; consider using: 'plenty of (Ph)'.
Suggestion: plenty of (Ph)
...d. According to a research conducted by plenty of Ph.D. students at John Hopkins University,...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 770, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...ob leads him to work harder and harder. Therefore he is promoted soon because his boss mo...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, second, so, therefore, thus, as to, for instance

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 11.0286738351 190% => OK
Pronoun: 60.0 43.0788530466 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2150.0 1977.66487455 109% => OK
No of words: 469.0 407.700716846 115% => OK
Chars per words: 4.5842217484 4.8611393121 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65364457471 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73991935778 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 238.0 212.727598566 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.507462686567 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 693.9 618.680645161 112% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 7.0 3.08781362007 227% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.9311916543 48.9658058833 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.7272727273 100.406767564 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.3181818182 20.6045352989 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.0 5.45110844103 55% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.305503367491 0.236089414692 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0850616086684 0.076458572812 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.094537774223 0.0737576698707 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.208047630145 0.150856017488 138% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0750445874597 0.0645574589148 116% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 11.7677419355 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.28 10.9000537634 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.91 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 86.8835125448 110% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.