Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?

Essay topics:

Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?

Training children is among important topics in psychology. There are different hypothesis and approaches about this topic. One of these theories mention that, offering reward is beneficial for training children and has positive effects. Giving reward has several forms. One of these forms is offering children money for high grades they get in school. In spite of some people disagree with this idea, personally, I believe that it is a good idea to offer children money for high grades they get in school. In the following, I map out some arguments to elaborate my position.

To begin with, I want to mention the importance of encouragement in the process of training children. Scientists believe that, encouragement make motivation and confidence in children. Parents can show encouragement in many ways. One of these ways, is offer children money for high grades they get in school. It has some benefits that I want to mention them. When a person get reward for doing something, he understands the value of his job. It is true about offer money to children. They get reward for high grades. Then they discover that this job will be accompanied with reward and because of that they will try harder to get better grades. The circle-shape process will be made. In this way, they increase their efforts and will be more successful in school.

Second, as I mentioned above, encouragement and offer money as reward, make children more self-confident. It is a form of attention that parents give to their children. Parents value their children’s effort in this way. When parents offer money to children for their high grades, children understand that their efforts are valuable. Also, children discover that, their parents care about them and notice their purposes. Children will be more concentrate on their lessons to get high grades again and can get more attention from their parents. A process has been made here too. Whatever attention they get from their parents they will be more self-confident.

In conclusion, I believe that, it is a good idea to offer money to children for their high grades in school. It is beneficial for them. If they get reward for their high grades they will be try harder and will be more successful. Also, this approach makes them more self-confident.

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Average: 6 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 80, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'hypotheses', 'hypothesises'?
Suggestion: hypotheses; hypothesises
...pics in psychology. There are different hypothesis and approaches about this topic. One of...
^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, if, second, so, then, in conclusion, in spite of, it is true, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 61.0 43.0788530466 142% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 46.0 52.1666666667 88% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 8.0752688172 173% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1923.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 382.0 407.700716846 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.03403141361 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.42095241839 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75995696754 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 148.0 212.727598566 70% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.387434554974 0.524837075471 74% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 571.5 618.680645161 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 30.0 20.6003584229 146% => OK
Sentence length: 12.0 20.1344086022 60% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 32.0184668937 48.9658058833 65% => OK
Chars per sentence: 64.1 100.406767564 64% => OK
Words per sentence: 12.7333333333 20.6045352989 62% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.7 5.45110844103 50% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 19.0 11.8709677419 160% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.88709677419 184% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.500793836483 0.236089414692 212% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.152856618039 0.076458572812 200% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.145296532678 0.0737576698707 197% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.372199458459 0.150856017488 247% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0435347838353 0.0645574589148 67% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.6 11.7677419355 73% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 67.76 58.1214874552 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.8 10.1575268817 67% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.01 10.9000537634 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.75 8.01818996416 84% => OK
difficult_words: 61.0 86.8835125448 70% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 6.8 10.0537634409 68% => OK
text_standard: 7.0 10.247311828 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.