TPO 35- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Privacy is very important for everybody and it is one of the peoples right in democratic and liberal country.However,technology advancement makes it much more difficult to having privacy these days. I think famous people like athlets and actors have the right to have more privacy and they have to fight for their right.Because they are famous does not mean they have to be in public and can not have private life.
First of all, they are human and like other humans have the right to keep their private life silent. Although their follower eagerly want to know more about them ,it will hurt them and we can see most of them are bottered by this approach.For example,even a small talk or partying can make lots of problem for them which could be very accessible for ordinary people.
Moreover, they are good at something and become famous and this does not mean that they are flawless and saint.Projecting light in their private life ruin their popularity and even their decent work . I think this is not fair to see their work less due to their private life.
Lastly, by violation of privacy they can not focus on their work and this hurt them as well. For example, for an artist or musicion an invention needs inspiration. If they do not have secure life and be worried about their public feature all the time their innovation would hurt. In fact a prosper mind needs ordinary life to be inspired and starts new work.Too much attention to such unimportant things reduces their productivity.
In conclution, I completely agree with the more privacy for famous people .I think they are human and deseve to live like others with privacy and enjoy the simplicity of their life to create innovation .

Votes
Average: 4 (2 votes)
Essay Categories
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 110, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
...right in democratic and liberal country.However,technology advancement makes it much mo...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 117, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , technology
...n democratic and liberal country.However,technology advancement makes it much more difficul...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 321, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Because
... and they have to fight for their right.Because they are famous does not mean they have...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 161, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...wer eagerly want to know more about them ,it will hurt them and we can see most of...
^^
Line 2, column 239, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: For
...t of them are bottered by this approach.For example,even a small talk or partying c...
^^^
Line 2, column 250, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , even
...re bottered by this approach.For example,even a small talk or partying can make lots ...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 290, Rule ID: LOTS_OF_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun problem seems to be countable; consider using: 'lots of problems'.
Suggestion: lots of problems
...,even a small talk or partying can make lots of problem for them which could be very accessible...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 111, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Projecting
...t mean that they are flawless and saint.Projecting light in their private life ruin their ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 198, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ir popularity and even their decent work . I think this is not fair to see their w...
^^
Line 4, column 273, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ture all the time their innovation would hurt. In fact a prosper mind needs ordin...
^^
Line 4, column 289, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...e their innovation would hurt. In fact a prosper mind needs ordinary life to be inspired...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 359, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Too
...life to be inspired and starts new work.Too much attention to such unimportant thin...
^^^
Line 5, column 74, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
... with the more privacy for famous people .I think they are human and deseve to liv...
^^
Line 5, column 75, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: I
...ith the more privacy for famous people .I think they are human and deseve to live...
^
Line 5, column 201, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...icity of their life to create innovation .
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, however, if, lastly, moreover, so, well, for example, i think, in fact, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 2.0 11.0286738351 18% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 41.0 43.0788530466 95% => OK
Preposition: 34.0 52.1666666667 65% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1405.0 1977.66487455 71% => OK
No of words: 295.0 407.700716846 72% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.76271186441 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.14434120667 4.48103885553 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73764498927 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 151.0 212.727598566 71% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.51186440678 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 441.0 618.680645161 71% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 20.6003584229 53% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 63.3567884652 48.9658058833 129% => OK
Chars per sentence: 127.727272727 100.406767564 127% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.8181818182 20.6045352989 130% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.27272727273 5.45110844103 152% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 15.0 5.5376344086 271% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.180058158828 0.236089414692 76% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0794459768269 0.076458572812 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0838129116973 0.0737576698707 114% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.119140356264 0.150856017488 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0874534166573 0.0645574589148 135% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.4 11.7677419355 122% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.55 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.62 10.9000537634 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.87 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 55.0 86.8835125448 63% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.002688172 135% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200

Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.