the reading passage was about private fossil collectors - sohrab
In this set of material, the reading passage was about private fossil collectors, and the listening passage was a lecture by a professor about the reading passage, which agreed the mentioned information in the reading passage.
According to the reading passage, there are some major problems for old and valuable fossils nowadays. To explain more, the problem is related to the private collectors, who have been selling and buying fossils for a long time. Moreover, these kind of business has made some serious problem for many people. According to the mentioned examples in the reading passage, some of these problems have big effects. For example, when fossils became restricted in collectors' hands, people in the society are not able to see the fossils in the museums. Scientists, moreover, are not able to study on fossils for scientific reasons, which they can be useful for dating and other scientific purposes. Finally, fossil collectors usually destroy valuable fossils because of the lack of knowledge and training, they, as a result, destroy very special and valuable evidences from long time ago.
According to the listening passage, professor was agree with mentioned problems and information in the reading passage. To begin with, professor approved that fossil collectors are the cause of the important lack in people's knowledge about the past. She, in addition, mentioned all of fossils should be available for the scientists not for the collectors. Finally, she mentioned the physical problems in the fossils, which are very important for society.
Overall, the mentioned information in the listening passage agreed the information in the reading passage, and, also, add some new evidences to the reading information.
- it is better for every person to have broad knowledge 80
- extended family is less important now than it was in the past - sohrab 80
- do you agree or disagree with this statement?Teachers should not make their social or political views known to students in the classroom. 80
- young children should not be prevented in using their money - sohrab 70
- the best way to travel is in group led by a tour guide - sohrab 60
professor was agree with mentioned problems
the professor agreed with the mentioned problems
flaws:
You didn't write the essay in 'ETS style'
The correct pattern:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3
Don't need a conclusion paragraph.
Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 18 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 12
No. of Words: 273 250
No. of Characters: 1419 1200
No. of Different Words: 120 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.065 4.2
Average Word Length: 5.198 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.606 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 119 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 106 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 57 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 38 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.177 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.615 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.414 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.57 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.122 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4