The extended family is less important now than it was in the past
In the university we live, everything is subject to alteration. Mankind, from the beginning of the genesis until now, has also experienced considerable development. With this in mind, there are opposing views about the importance of the extended family in the past in comparison to that of in the present time. While some believe that nowadays, people pay less attention to the extended family, others hold the opposite view. As far as I am concerned, the first attitude carries more weight for more than a few reasons, three of the most substantial of which are discussed below.
The most compelling reason is that in today's modern world, that everybody has to be in rush so as to not to be left behind in contending for the "field of competition", is nucleus of any successful society, and they are more focusing on their goals, and what they want to achieve; as a result, they work more and more; hence, and enjoying less leisure time to spend with their families, especially their extended families, which has led to the fact that the extended family has lost its meaning today.
Another interpretation as to why I do not concur with the latter attitude in the introductory paragraph, lies in the fact that our lifestyle, as it is commonly perceived, has been affected by the galloping rate of technological advancement offering a more convenient life. Every day, new facilities and technologies are offered, which can be tempting for anyone. These facilities have truly expanded individuals' communication in the way that one can make a friend in the distant countries. Therefore, individuals' relationship is not constrained to their extended families which in turn plays an inevitable role in diminishing the value of the extended family.
Last but not the least reason is that today's modern generation is different from those in the past in many aspects. It seems to me that the major difference among ours and our parents is that we do not care about our traditions and rituals as much as our ancestors did, who thought that clinging to rituals and traditions is one of the vital characteristics of a person. According to a research conducted in of the reputable universities in my country, today's modern generation strives to eliminate everything, which is so-called "obstacle", thinking that it hinders the way for enjoying a convenient life although traditions and rituals may be beneficial for the society.
In summary, having considered all the aforementioned ingredients discussed above, I firmly endorse my point of view that today, the extended family is not as significant as that was in the past due to people's hectic lifestyle, changing one’s communication—thanks to technology advancement, and having less commitment to traditions
- tpo 42 70
- It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parents’ jobs than to choose jobs that are very different from their parents’ job. 80
- The extended family is less important now than it was in the past. 73
- People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries 70
- TPO-43 - Independent Writing Task Imagine that you are in a classroom or a meeting. The teacher or the meeting leader says something incorrect In your opinion, which of the following is the best thing to do?-Interrupt and correct the mistake right away-Wa 76
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 93, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...world, that everybody has to be in rush so as to not to be left behind in contending for...
^^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'hence', 'if', 'may', 'so', 'therefore', 'while', 'as to', 'in summary', 'as a result']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.214859437751 0.229887763892 93% => OK
Verbs: 0.158634538153 0.158761421928 100% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0983935742972 0.0866891130778 114% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0522088353414 0.046263068375 113% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0461847389558 0.0685040099705 67% => OK
Prepositions: 0.146586345382 0.118717715034 123% => OK
Participles: 0.0602409638554 0.0351676179071 171% => OK
Conjunctions: 3.09847324589 2.67179642975 116% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0361445783133 0.0309702414327 117% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00188951952338 0% => More particles wanted.
Determiners: 0.100401606426 0.0887237588012 113% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.00602409638554 0.0209618222197 29% => Some modal verbs wanted.
WH_determiners: 0.0160642570281 0.0139019557991 116% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2752.0 2387.08602151 115% => OK
No of words: 452.0 408.028673835 111% => OK
Chars per words: 6.08849557522 5.86048508987 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.61088837703 4.48200974243 103% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.356194690265 0.338922669872 105% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.29203539823 0.251872472559 116% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.236725663717 0.174417080927 136% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.161504424779 0.112833075102 143% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.09847324589 2.67179642975 116% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 212.727598566 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.535398230088 0.524397521467 102% => OK
Word variations: 62.8351162803 59.2087087015 106% => OK
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6684587814 68% => OK
Sentence length: 32.2857142857 20.5533526081 157% => OK
Sentence length SD: 117.372683955 48.84282405 240% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 196.571428571 120.699889404 163% => OK
Words per sentence: 32.2857142857 20.5533526081 157% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.857142857143 0.644075263715 133% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.5376344086 110% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.54480286738 18% => OK
Readability: 61.4892541087 45.7405998639 134% => OK
Elegance: 1.640625 1.45489161554 113% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.446645851833 0.300154397459 149% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.1255103482 0.103427244359 121% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0702058068834 0.0752933317313 93% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.631148684349 0.497263757937 127% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.200682016508 0.151897553556 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.218129541744 0.114077575197 191% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0918706728506 0.0781384742642 118% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.427935287298 0.336927656856 127% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0210400040505 0.067059652881 31% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.312385970542 0.210909579961 148% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0824418445284 0.0618886996521 133% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8870967742 59% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.86379928315 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.91756272401 81% => OK
Positive topic words: 6.0 8.42114695341 71% => OK
Negative topic words: 3.0 2.4623655914 122% => OK
Neutral topic words: 3.0 2.75985663082 109% => OK
Total topic words: 12.0 13.6433691756 88% => OK
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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations to cover all aspects.