The following is taken from a memo from the advertising director of the Super Screen Movie Production Company. "According to a recent report from our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen-produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the past year. Clearly, the contents of these reviews are not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not with the quality of our movies but with the public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available. Super Screen should therefore allocate a greater share of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising
The author concludes that according to survey and report of marketing department, in last few years, less poeple are attending movie but review of movies are increased during these past year. However, it is clear that content of movie are not reaching towards people. There is problem of publicity not content of movie. For next production the Super Screen Movie going to allocate large share of budget to advertising. However, the conclusion relies on assumption for which there is no limpid evidences.
Firstly, the author assumes that report from marketing department about the fewer poeple attending movies in past year than any other year because of lack of publicity. This assumption holds no good point, there might be a another reasons also to not attending movies. People might bored of watching Super Screen-produced movie. Even if they are making good content that does not mean all people watch there movie. The author lacks credibility here, He should have mention more reports about the people who are going to watch there movies.
In addition, the author assumes that review of movies are good means content of movie are also good to watch. This assumption is irrelative and plausible. There is lack of statistical data about reviews. The author should have mentioned more review report and number of report which was surveyed. Sometime review is total depend on people who watched movie but most of them gives random review so it is depend on number of people who watched Super Screen-produced movie.
Finally, the author assumes that if we spend more money on publicity by advertising then it will be revoke lack of awareness. This assumption is totally irrelative and opaque. There is no evidence that people are not aware of Super Screen's movie. The author should given more evidences about publicity and lack of awarness. There might be some another reasons to watch movie, people might already known about Super Screen's movie but they might now like different production companies movie or different content movie.
In conclusion, this argument depends on certain simplified assumption about declining viewers of movie and their content assumption based on only reviews. The author could have strengthen the argument by discussing other factor beyond publicity and review before concluding that publicity is the only problem of lack of attending people in past years.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: The author concludes that according to survey and report of marketing department, in last few years, less poeple are attending movie but review of movies are increased during these past year.
Error: poeple Suggestion: people
Sentence: Firstly, the author assumes that report from marketing department about the fewer poeple attending movies in past year than any other year because of lack of publicity.
Error: poeple Suggestion: people
Sentence: This assumption is irrelative and plausible.
Error: irrelative Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: This assumption is totally irrelative and opaque.
Error: irrelative Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: The author should given more evidences about publicity and lack of awarness.
Error: awarness Suggestion: awareness
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flaws:
the arguments are not exactly right on the point.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 387 350
No. of Characters: 1967 1500
No. of Different Words: 168 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.435 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.083 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.448 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 146 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 92 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 60 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.591 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.043 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.338 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.499 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.093 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 222, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...ion holds no good point, there might be a another reasons also to not attending m...
^
Line 3, column 283, Rule ID: BORED_OF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'bored with'?
Suggestion: bored with
...o to not attending movies. People might bored of watching Super Screen-produced movie. E...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 330, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[2]
Message: “Even if” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...f watching Super Screen-produced movie. Even if they are making good content that does ...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 404, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'depended'.
Suggestion: depended
...st of them gives random review so it is depend on number of people who watched Super S...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 266, Rule ID: PRP_PAST_PART[2]
Message: Did you mean 'have given' or 'give'?
Suggestion: have given; give
... Super Screens movie. The author should given more evidences about publicity and lack...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 519, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...anies movie or different content movie. In conclusion, this argument depends on ...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 178, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'strengthened'.
Suggestion: strengthened
... on only reviews. The author could have strengthen the argument by discussing other factor...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, however, if, so, then, in addition, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 55.5748502994 99% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2014.0 2260.96107784 89% => OK
No of words: 387.0 441.139720559 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.20413436693 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.43534841618 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.51339778774 2.78398813304 90% => OK
Unique words: 173.0 204.123752495 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.447028423773 0.468620217663 95% => OK
syllable_count: 621.0 705.55239521 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 49.6640157741 57.8364921388 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.5454545455 119.503703932 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.5909090909 23.324526521 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.86363636364 5.70786347227 68% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.271070421909 0.218282227539 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0784019976929 0.0743258471296 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0844346846482 0.0701772020484 120% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.162433919855 0.128457276422 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0673566558643 0.0628817314937 107% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 14.3799401198 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.58 12.5979740519 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.5 8.32208582834 90% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 98.500998004 75% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.