TPO40Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think it is a good idea?

Essay topics:

TPO40
Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think it is a good idea?

In at attempt to entice their children to buckle down in learning, some parents always promise a financial reward for each high marks children get in school. Nevertheless, I deem that counterproductive are these promises of money for high grades.

To begin with, money rewards may potentially ruin the outlook of children. When there is a scarcity of right guidance from parents, children, who are not sophisticated as any adults, would be probably misled easily about the functions of money. And they virtually have a quite straightforward understanding of how to manage money. On the contrary, praise might be an appropriate way for parents in response to children’s excellent performance in school. praising the effort that children are putting into their schoolwork can help them find their own inner-push to succeed.

Moreover, parents’ bribes with cash for each high marks would contribute to the cultivation of children’s bad habits. children are likely to be more and more greedy—they are inclined to seek more material rewards or even worse have an insatiable demand for money. In other words, these bribes might bring short-term gain but long-term pain to both parents and kids. Alternatively, parents should assist their kids to set their goals and inspire them to work their hardest to reach the goals. It is the inner motivation that renders continuous learning and improvement.

Finally, the financial rewards for children’s positive result in school reduce the motivation and creativity of those youngsters. Influenced by the condition, they would pay more attention to how to get a high grade rather than what degree they should master the knowledge. Consequently, in the course of time, the love of learning goes out, thereby weakening the thirst of knowledge, decreasing the drive for achievement, and stopping the exploration of the unknown.

Drawing from the points discussed above, I would like to reinforce my perspective that parents paying money rewards for high grades to their children is merely a short-run solution of incentive to learn, which can alleviate undesirable symptoms but will not address the essential problems.

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Average: 7.6 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 460, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Praising
...apos;s excellent performance in school. praising the effort that children are putting in...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 129, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Children
...tivation of children's bad habits. children are likely to be more and more greedy—t...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 266, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ndesirable symptoms but will not address the essential problems.
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, finally, look, may, moreover, nevertheless, so, in other words, on the contrary, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 24.0 43.0788530466 56% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1849.0 1977.66487455 93% => OK
No of words: 341.0 407.700716846 84% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.42228739003 4.8611393121 112% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.29722995808 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.07430419895 2.67179642975 115% => OK
Unique words: 205.0 212.727598566 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.601173020528 0.524837075471 115% => OK
syllable_count: 540.0 618.680645161 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.7128112149 48.9658058833 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.5625 100.406767564 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.3125 20.6045352989 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.0625 5.45110844103 130% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.348308791953 0.236089414692 148% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.106883325555 0.076458572812 140% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0740778750612 0.0737576698707 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.203773952163 0.150856017488 135% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0630925916339 0.0645574589148 98% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 11.7677419355 126% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.16 10.9000537634 130% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.03 8.01818996416 113% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 86.8835125448 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.247311828 146% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.