TPO40
Throughout history, education has always played an important role in every society. Due to its paramount importance, scholars have perpetually been trying to elevate the effectiveness of the educational system. One of the most controversial questions which have caused a heated debate among academician is whether it is good or not if parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade they get in school. Personally, I believe that it is not a good idea and has bad effects on children. In the following paragraphs, I will delve into the most important reasons.
The first exquisite point to be mentioned is that if parents offer their children money for their high grades, they will become spoiled. We know that the children’s personality is formed at school age. Therefore, parents should do their to nurture their children during this age. If they give money to their children when they get a high mark in school, they will expect to get prize for every good thing they do in the future. Hence, not only will they become spoiled, but also their viewpoint of life will be affected because they think there is always a prize after doing every good thing. For example, imagine a child who receives money from their parents after every high mark got at school. When this child grows up and enters university, he will expect to get a prize from the professors, but he does not. When he does a good thing for one of his friends, he expects to get a prize as well! Such a person cannot have a good life because of his high expectation for every little good thing he does in his life because, most of the time, we will not get what we deserve. If he had learned it earlier in his life, he would have a more realistic view of his life. Consequently, offering money for getting a high mark will not have a good impact on children’s personalities.
Another equally important reason to be mentioned is that the incentive to study and get high grades should be something more worthwhile than money. All of us need a kind of incentive to do things we have to do better. The more motivated we are, the better we do that task, and children are not excluded. Therefore, parents should provide a worthwhile incentive for their children to study hard and get high marks at school. For example, they can tell a story of a very famous scientist or inventor, which has affected humans' lives in a positive way. Then, tell their children that if you study hard and get high marks, you will be accepted in the best universities and find the best jobs. By having this job, you can be a very effective person in society and improve people’s lives. In this way, children can set high goals for themselves from the very beginning and study with purpose, which is much more better than receiving money for a good grade.
To sum up, I believe that offering children money for their good grades is not a good idea because they become spoiled, and because there are more worthwhile motivations to inspire them to study hard rather than money.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2022-07-24 | zmz | 76 | view |
| 2022-07-23 | zmz | 73 | view |
| 2021-01-09 | Pooja dave | 73 | view |
| 2021-01-09 | Pooja dave | 73 | view |
| 2021-01-08 | ReemTaha | 60 | view |
- TPO40 3
- Some parent offer their school age children money for each high grade mark they get in school Do you think this is a good idea Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer 73
- TPO40 3
- TPO41 3
- Grades encourage students to work harder at school Do you agree or disagree Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion 76
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 6, column 532, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a positive way" with adverb for "positive"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...ventor, which has affected humans lives in a positive way. Then, tell their children that if you ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 902, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'better' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: better
...g and study with purpose, which is much more better than receiving money for a good grade. ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, hence, if, so, then, therefore, well, while, for example, kind of, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 9.8082437276 184% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 63.0 43.0788530466 146% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 55.0 52.1666666667 105% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2510.0 1977.66487455 127% => OK
No of words: 538.0 407.700716846 132% => OK
Chars per words: 4.66542750929 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.81610080973 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52886488617 2.67179642975 95% => OK
Unique words: 230.0 212.727598566 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.42750929368 0.524837075471 81% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 774.0 618.680645161 125% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.5241243122 48.9658058833 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.583333333 100.406767564 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.4166666667 20.6045352989 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.5 5.45110844103 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 11.8709677419 152% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.236089414692 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.076458572812 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0737576698707 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.150856017488 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0645574589148 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 11.7677419355 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 58.1214874552 114% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.1 10.9000537634 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.13 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 82.0 86.8835125448 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.