The following appeared as a recommendation by a committee planning a ten-year budget for the city of Calatrava.
"The birthrate in our city is declining: in fact, last year's birthrate was only one-half that of five years ago. Thus the number of students enrolled in our public schools will soon decrease dramatically, and we can safely reduce the funds budgeted for education during the next decade. At the same time, we can reduce funding for athletic playing fields and other recreational facilities. As a result, we will have sufficient money to fund city facilities and programs used primarily by adults, since we can expect the adult population of the city to increase."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The recommendation is given by committee, planning a ten year budget of the city Calatrava stated that, the birth rate is decreasing drastically and because of this city may decrease the budget for education and athletic and other recreational purpose. However, before the recommendation can be properly evaluated, three questions must be answered.
First of all, the enrollment in public school is decreasing because of decreasing public school? It is possible that, because of merit based selection process in the public school some children did not get admission in the public school if we consider that, in the future decreasing number of children, all of the children get admission and also possible that quality of education in public may be increases. if either of this scenarios has merit then the original argument are weakened.
Secondly, do in future the cost of education is not changing ? here the committee member is prematurely assumed that, the city do not required the more budget than last year because of decrease in birth rate. perhaps, the cost of education is increasing to year-to-year. if this is case then maybe the idea of lowering budget is going to trouble for city governance. if above argument is true, then recommendation does not hold water.
Thirdly, do the child not playing athlete in future? The committee member stated that, city should reduce the funding of athletic playing field and for recreational activity. but the athletic field is use by children as well as adult in day-to-day life. If city reduce the funding of athletic and residence demanding the improvement in playing field then recommendation given by argument is weakened.
In conclusion, as it stands now, the argument is flawed due to the unwarranted assumptions. If committee will give the answers of above three questions and study (research) and survey about city resident demand then it is will possible to evaluate the given recommendation.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 10 15
No. of Words: 316 350
No. of Characters: 1596 1500
No. of Different Words: 143 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.216 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.051 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.84 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 122 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 92 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 31.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 21.355 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 1 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.376 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.721 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.128 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ted, three questions must be answered. First of all, the enrollm...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 320, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...e future decreasing number of children, all of the chidren get admission and also possible...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 425, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
...f education in public may be increases. if either of this scenarios has merit then...
^^
Line 3, column 425, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “if” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...f education in public may be increases. if either of this scenarios has merit then...
^^
Line 3, column 438, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...n public may be increases. if either of this scenarios has merit then the original a...
^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...the original argument are weakened. Secondly, do in future the cost of educa...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 79, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Here
...the cost of education is not changing ? here the committee member is prematurely ass...
^^^^
Line 5, column 225, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Perhaps
...year because of decrease in birth rate. perhaps, the cost of education is increasing to...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 287, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
...ducation is increasing to year-to-year. if this is case then maybe the idea of low...
^^
Line 5, column 383, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
...s going to trouble for city governance. if above argument is true, then recommenda...
^^
Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...hen recommendaton does not hold water. Thirdly, do the child not ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 191, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...ng field and for recreational activity. but the athletic field is use by children a...
^^^
Line 8, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ddation given by argument is weakened. In conclusion, as it stand...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, then, third, thirdly, well, in conclusion, as well as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.9520958084 54% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 13.0 28.8173652695 45% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 55.5748502994 72% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1645.0 2260.96107784 73% => OK
No of words: 316.0 441.139720559 72% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.20569620253 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.21620550194 4.56307096286 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93456113179 2.78398813304 105% => OK
Unique words: 152.0 204.123752495 74% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.481012658228 0.468620217663 103% => OK
syllable_count: 513.0 705.55239521 73% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 70.3472414171 57.8364921388 122% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.8125 119.503703932 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.75 23.324526521 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.8125 5.70786347227 137% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.25449101796 247% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.188950020575 0.218282227539 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0617850117182 0.0743258471296 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0802682801885 0.0701772020484 114% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.110229271245 0.128457276422 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0859819055232 0.0628817314937 137% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.94 12.5979740519 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.13 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 71.0 98.500998004 72% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.