(IELTS 5/6/2016) Nowadays, young people admire stars though they often do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
These days, admiring celebrities is assumed to make many positive effects on fans' living. There are, however, many huge concern about adverse ones. I, personally, would contend that this trend has both the merits of developments and its drawbacks. This essay will be discussed in-deptly below.
On the one hand, it brings an array of advangtages. Firstly, the fans follow in stars’ footsteps. Indeed, they are perfect mirrors associated with many aspects of life like morality for fans to immiate. For example, many years ago, Emma Waston, talented actress and Will Ambrassador, made a speech about femilism motivating a massively huge number of womens to have equal rights and breaking roughly steteotypes of gender. Similarly, the fans climb the labber of success. Behind gorgeous stages, the proccess of training and practising of idols are phenomenon worthing caring due to its sense of hard. Sometimes, living of fans are in trouble; so this period time of stars helps them have motivations to pass and continously purse their dreams.
On the other hand, its disadvantages can not be ignored. First and foremost, the fans are so so crazy about stars. Some tend to blindly adored. It is illustrated by the event of hard period of country when central areas are impacted seriously by natural disasters; many fans accidentally donate a massive amount of money just to make fame for their foreign idols. Additionally, the fans imminate unsuitable things. There is permanently gap between idols and fans. Irrespective of ages and jobs, some immiate to create colourful hairs, tatoo or too sexy clothes.
Overall, from the points I discussed above, I assume that this trend impacts both positively and negatively.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 131, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tsteps. Indeed, they are perfect mirrors associated with many aspects of life lik...
^^
Line 6, column 91, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: so
...nored. First and foremost, the fans are so so crazy about stars. Some tend to blindly...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, however, if, similarly, so, for example, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 13.1623246493 84% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 10.4138276553 96% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 7.30460921844 41% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 18.0 24.0651302605 75% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 41.998997996 98% => OK
Nominalization: 0.0 8.3376753507 0% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1451.0 1615.20841683 90% => OK
No of words: 277.0 315.596192385 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.23826714801 5.12529762239 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.07962216107 4.20363070211 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71177052561 2.80592935109 97% => OK
Unique words: 187.0 176.041082164 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.675090252708 0.561755894193 120% => OK
syllable_count: 455.4 506.74238477 90% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 5.0 2.52805611222 198% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 16.0721442886 118% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.2975951904 69% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 54.2288165364 49.4020404114 110% => OK
Chars per sentence: 76.3684210526 106.682146367 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.5789473684 20.7667163134 70% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.89473684211 7.06120827912 55% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.67935871743 138% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0672038302057 0.244688304435 27% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0199250035254 0.084324248473 24% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0274935809564 0.0667982634062 41% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.049586321603 0.151304729494 33% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0335276628554 0.056905535591 59% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.5 13.0946893788 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.27 50.2224549098 114% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.8 11.3001002004 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.52 12.4159519038 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.92 8.58950901804 115% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 78.4519038076 125% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 9.78957915832 66% => OK
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.1190380762 75% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 11.2359550562 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.