Some people say that individuals who make a lot of money are the most successful. Others think that those who contribute to society like scientists and teachers are more successful.
Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
Many would argue that those who contribute significantly to society, such as artists, teachers and scientists, are more successful than the affluent. In my opinion, although earnings can be a sign of success, one’s worldly impact should be held in higher esteem.
On the one hand, wealth allows an individual to enjoy their life to the fullest. It is common in popular culture to elevate values related to altruism, however, most honest individuals would admit that success can be equated with what one can afford. The wealthy can afford the possessions and lifestyle they desire and also have the free time and peace of mind to completely enjoy their leisure. In past centuries, such people were admired as shameless examples of personal enjoyment. Therefore, this financial freedom can be viewed as the strictest and more direct definition of success.
However, money itself does not always engender a feeling of satisfaction in the same way as more active pursuits in life. Many wealthy individuals feel that they have contributed little to society and this diminishes their enjoyment of their gains. Such dissatisfaction is less present in individuals who, as long as they are not living in destitute poverty, pursue meaningful outlets for their energies. For example, renowned scientists throughout history are often not extremely wealthy, yet they are considered great successes due to their contributions and the personal joy they derive from the full exercise of their abilities. This fact can be extended to all other professions that involve determination, creativity, and the growth of one’s influence.
In conclusion, despite the material benefits of wealth, it is clear that one’s ability to shape the world is a surer symbol of success. Every individual and society must locate a balance between these two ideals.
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| 2022-03-07 | iambest | 73 | view |
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| 2021-12-28 | Nguyễn Xuân Sơn | 78 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 174, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... and they also contribute to the society but don’t require any recognition. Unlik...
^^
Line 5, column 1126, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[3]
Message: “So that” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... do play a crucial role in our society. So that would be a mistake to say they don’t ha...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, however, if, moreover, so, therefore, while, in addition, in conclusion, in short, no doubt, such as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 13.1623246493 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 7.85571142285 140% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 10.4138276553 202% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 10.0 7.30460921844 137% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 24.0651302605 175% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 55.0 41.998997996 131% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 8.3376753507 204% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2433.0 1615.20841683 151% => OK
No of words: 450.0 315.596192385 143% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.40666666667 5.12529762239 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.6057793516 4.20363070211 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.06214562072 2.80592935109 109% => OK
Unique words: 199.0 176.041082164 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.442222222222 0.561755894193 79% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 748.8 506.74238477 148% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 5.43587174349 258% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 2.52805611222 119% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.76152304609 147% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 16.0721442886 131% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.2975951904 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 65.9901387534 49.4020404114 134% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.857142857 106.682146367 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.4285714286 20.7667163134 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.61904761905 7.06120827912 94% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 8.67935871743 184% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.316758729236 0.244688304435 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.100232030253 0.084324248473 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0775257578001 0.0667982634062 116% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.21403206756 0.151304729494 141% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0695528844823 0.056905535591 122% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 13.0946893788 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.7 50.2224549098 83% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 11.3001002004 112% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.1 12.4159519038 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.47 8.58950901804 99% => OK
difficult_words: 108.0 78.4519038076 138% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 9.78957915832 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.1190380762 103% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.7795591182 139% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.