"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author is stating that the students who are enrolling to Buckingham's college has to have dormitory adequate to fit in the all students. Though the author's intention seems quiet helpful to the students, they are many conclusions drawn which seem unjust. There are so many loop holes in the position of statements made by author. No proper corroborations are supplied to the statements, and having not said that drawing the conclusions seem facile.
On the first hand, author is stating that the with the general trend, the enrollment would be redoubled over next fifty years. This statement cannot be proved. It may be likely that some other college may start in the mean time which may become more illustrious than Buckingham college. Even though the college is currently famous and is taking in more admissions, the same trend need not stay even after fifty years. Hence the conclusion to increase the dormitory space due to the fact that number of students might increase is meaningless.
Secondly, the author is not stating that what kind of students are enrolling to the college. Whether they are residents of same town, city or are from different city, country. If the students are coming from far places then of course they will first try to find dormitories provided by the college. More student enrollment does not mean that all students are coming from far places. They may be likely the residents of same town or city. Without having the statistics that how many students are coming from far places, suggesting to increase the dormitory space seems unjust.
Further, the college is famous may be likely to its good education, training methodologies and the profound scholars. Hence it is more likely that the student will join the college to have good and depth education. Instead the author is stating that more students will enroll if the dormitories look more impressive. This statement proves to be a facetious. No student will join the college just by looking attractive qualities of the college dormitories.
Thus in total, there are several flaws which needs to be addressed by the author, before drawing the conclusion. Without proper evidence and only considering the assumptions, the conclusions cannot be accepted.
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2019-10-15 | abhishekp2301 | 50 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not OK. This is not the point for arguments.
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
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also need to argue:
Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 370 350
No. of Characters: 1832 1500
No. of Different Words: 169 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.386 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.951 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.547 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 132 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.818 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.868 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.31 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.524 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.058 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 152, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
... to fit in the all students. Though the authors intention seems quiet helpful to the st...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 419, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...d need not stay even after fifty years. Hence the conclusion to increase the dormitor...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 119, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...ethodologies and the profound scholars. Hence it is more likely that the student will...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 216, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Instead,
...llege to have good and depth education. Instead the author is stating that more student...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 346, Rule ID: DT_JJ_NO_NOUN[1]
Message: Probably a noun is missing in this part of the sentence.
...impressive. This statement proves to be a facetious. No student will join the college just ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...alities of the college dormitories. Thus in total, there are several flaws which...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, hence, if, look, may, second, secondly, so, then, thus, as to, kind of, of course
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 55.5748502994 76% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1882.0 2260.96107784 83% => OK
No of words: 370.0 441.139720559 84% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.08648648649 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.38581623665 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63926080361 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 176.0 204.123752495 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.475675675676 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 571.5 705.55239521 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 29.3002411634 57.8364921388 51% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 85.5454545455 119.503703932 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.8181818182 23.324526521 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.0 5.70786347227 70% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.13777608354 0.218282227539 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0422814930765 0.0743258471296 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0417372022928 0.0701772020484 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.078160085021 0.128457276422 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0374785427838 0.0628817314937 60% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 14.3799401198 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 48.3550499002 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 12.197005988 69% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.95 12.5979740519 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.55 8.32208582834 91% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 98.500998004 74% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 12.3882235529 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.