It is true that the quality of competitiveness is essential in almost societies. Although there are several benefits from being competitive, I believe that the drawbacks of this tendency cannot be overlooked.
On the one hand, the development of communities based partly on this characteristic. In terms of positive effect on children attending schools, the more the variety of competitions they take part in, the more motivated they get from those contests. To more precise, they would dedicate themselves in studying actively and burning the midnight oil to achieve the targets that they aimed. This is simply because these teenagers do not want to be left behind by their peers. From the perspective of adults, they have to work assiduously to earn a living and get a higher job opportunities to support their families. In most companies, managers will give promotion for employees who are more outstanding than their co-workers. Therefore, it is cruel to possess a characteristic of competitiveness to climb up career ladders.
On the other hand, it is undeniable that this quality can lead to some serious problems related to health and belief. Firstly, many individuals are prone to physical and mental health due to … career treadmill. Currently, there is becoming increasingly people suffering from depression and obesity because they could not handle with the mass of workload. Secondly, people with competitive quality usually have a inclination to consider others as competitors. As a result, they will be more likely to have no trust in other people.
In conclusion, while I encourage people to have competitiveness in some level which its pressure do not harm to their health, the negative impact of it cannot be underestimated.
It is true that the quality of competitiveness is essential in almost societies. Although there are several benefits from being competitive, I believe that the drawbacks of this tendency cannot be overlooked.
On the one hand, the development of communities based partly on this characteristic. In terms of positive effect on children attending schools, the more the variety of competitions they take part in, the more motivated they get from those contests. To more precise, they would dedicate themselves in studying actively and burning the midnight oil to achieve the targets that they aimed. This is simply because these teenagers do not want to be left behind by their peers. From the perspective of adults, they have to work assiduously to earn a living and get a higher job opportunities to support their families. In most companies, managers will give promotion for employees who are more outstanding than their co-workers. Therefore, it is cruel to possess a characteristic of competitiveness to climb up career ladders.
On the other hand, it is undeniable that this quality can lead to some serious problems related to health and belief. Firstly, many individuals are prone to physical and mental health due to … career treadmill. Currently, there is becoming increasingly people suffering from depression and obesity because they could not handle with the mass of workload. Secondly, people with competitive quality usually have a inclination to consider others as competitors. As a result, they will be more likely to have no trust in other people.
In conclusion, while I encourage people to have competitiveness in some level which its pressure do not harm to their health, the negative impact of it cannot be underestimated.
- The table illustrates how much money was donated to developing countries in the period 2006 2010 by US and EU charities to support technological development Overall it is clear that total aid increased during this period US aid was considerably higher tha 56
- The line graph illustrates the amount of money which is received by rice exports from Thailand and Vietnam during the period from 2012 to 2015 It is evident that the prices of rice exports decreased tremendously from 2012 to 2015 Meanwhile the cost remain 56
- The idea that the only way to mitigate a load of traffic in a metropolis nowadays is by minimizing the number of citizens commuting from home to work study and entertainment Although some people believe that this tendency is beneficial I would argue that 84
- The pie charts given illustrate how much water was used in percentage over two the year 1997 and 2007 in Sydney Australia Overall it is evident that the food industry accounted for the largest proportion of total water in both years Besides the amount of 73
- It is said that the majority of television programmes had better concentrate on educating the young generation about the essence of social aspects While I partly agree with this idea other issues such as advertisement or entertainment cannot be overlooked 89
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...of this tendency cannot be overlooked. On the one hand, the development of comm...
^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...titiveness to climb up career ladders. On the other hand, it is undeniable that...
^^^
Line 5, column 411, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...e with competitive quality usually have a inclination to consider others as compe...
^
Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...kely to have no trust in other people. In conclusion, while I encourage people ...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, look, second, secondly, so, therefore, while, in conclusion, as a result, it is true, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 13.1623246493 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 7.85571142285 89% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 10.4138276553 48% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 7.30460921844 82% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 24.0651302605 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 46.0 41.998997996 110% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1473.0 1615.20841683 91% => OK
No of words: 280.0 315.596192385 89% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.26071428571 5.12529762239 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.09062348924 4.20363070211 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.12804749364 2.80592935109 111% => OK
Unique words: 168.0 176.041082164 95% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.6 0.561755894193 107% => OK
syllable_count: 462.6 506.74238477 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 5.43587174349 147% => OK
Article: 4.0 2.52805611222 158% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.76152304609 147% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.2975951904 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 30.7862884342 49.4020404114 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.2 106.682146367 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.6666666667 20.7667163134 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.93333333333 7.06120827912 112% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.01903807615 80% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.329433644867 0.244688304435 135% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.11077706388 0.084324248473 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.130849596603 0.0667982634062 196% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.256372360013 0.151304729494 169% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.232104396788 0.056905535591 408% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.7 13.0946893788 97% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 50.2224549098 89% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.3001002004 102% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.23 12.4159519038 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.1 8.58950901804 106% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 78.4519038076 103% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 9.78957915832 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.1190380762 91% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.