More and more people are becoming seriously overweight. Some people say that the price increase of fattening foods will solve this problem. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
The problem of an increasing number of people are suffering from obesity is of concern for government and citizens. Some suggest increasing the price of fattening foods in order to address the problem. As for me, I believe there are other methods can do a better job.
Raising the price of junk food can certainly help to shape consumers’ eating habits in some extend. Firstly, consumers would seek alternative options over sugary and fast foods because of limited budget. If the unhealthy foods, such as pizzas, burgers and soft drink cost too much, people would rather buy the cheap and health products so they can minimise expense, which in turn modifying eating behaviours. Secondly, increasing the price of junk foods is one way to tell grocery industries to manufacture, for example, sugar-free drink, fat-free sandwich, which more concern people’s health condition.
However, there are more methods can ease people’s weight problem. To start with, government should consider investing money on fitness facilities. For example, building more fitness centres and sport stadiums will encourage people to do exercise. Physical activities significantly assist trainers to burn fat and calories inside their bodies, thereby effectively promoting activating lifestyles and reducing overweight problems. Besides that, professional counsellors should give advice on healthy diet to general public so that people can pay attention to their dietary habits.
To sum up, raising the price of unhealthy foods is not the only way to help obese people. Government should put more effort on the improvement of public facilities or services to solve people’s weight problems.
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The problem of an increasing number of people are suffering from obesity is of concern for government and citizens.
The problem of an increasing number of people who are suffering from obesity is of concern for government and citizens.
I believe there are other methods can do a better job.
I believe there are other methods which can do a better job.
I believe other methods can do a better job.
so they can minimise expense, which in turn modifying eating behaviours.
so they can minimise expense, which in turn modifies eating behaviours.
sugar-free drink, fat-free sandwich, which more concern people’s health condition.
Description: can you re-write this sentence? check books how to use 'which'
there are more methods can ease people’s weight problem.
Description: two verbs in one sentence. can you re-write this sentence?
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Words: 258 350
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 258 350
No. of Characters: 1372 1500
No. of Different Words: 165 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.008 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.318 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.624 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 116 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 86 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 55 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.429 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.321 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.643 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.348 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.559 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.054 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5