People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
Human are integral part of a society. In turn, social circumstances significantly influences human behavior. The prompt also suggests in similar direction that an individual’s behavior is largely determined by external social forces. I mostly agree with the prompt due to two reasons which I will explain below. However, I do concede that there are extreme cases which shows that decisions are shaped by internal nature.
First of all, situations in life governs our response towards it. To explain my point, I will present a case. Consider a government official who is very honest and popular in the department due to his high moral. However, if his wife got diagnosed with cancer which requires immediate treatment. To execute the surgery and treatment, he needs high amount of funds to begin her treatment. In such dire situation, it is highly probable that the person will be provoked to accept bribe, even though it is against his core nature. Such instances shows that many of human’s decisions are majorly governed by external factors and some emergent situate requires extreme actions.
Further, society plays a role to shape our performance. History serves us many such examples. In past, society’s view towards women were very conservative. Hence, their role was also limited to selected sectors only. Majorly, women were involved in household activities. However, with change in time and perspective, role of women changed dramatically. Given the opportunity, they are now participating in field of sports to science to business to space. Women like Ms. Indra Nooyi, CEO of Pepsico company or Ms. Sunita Williams, well known Space researcher from NASA have proven their mettle in many conventional and unconventional sectors. This clearly shows that with change in attitude, women are presented with varied opportunities which were definitely limited in earlier time.
Moreover, Influence of social media is a well known to us. Young adults get easily influenced by the images and reports published in online platforms. As a result of this, many times they feel inferior and demotivated. Reports suggest that depression is emerging as one of the major issue in children and teens. Cosmetic industries are expanding exponentially due to increasing demand from youth. Another instance of social media influence is US Presidential election of year 2016. Post election, many reports surfaced which claimed that social media was used as mean to influence voters opinion. Plenty of cases prove that external factors hugely impact one’s decision.
However, I do concede that there exists few extreme cases which shows the dominance of internal trails over individual’s personality. For instance, Adolf Hitler. Hitler was not the only one who had difficult childhood. But his obsession with power and selfish motive hugely damaged Germany. On the other hand, Mahatma Gandhi, who laid the foundation of Indian Independence movement stood formidably against British government. Clearly, Gandhi ji’s opinion was not common opinion of society rather he influenced the masses and people venerated him. These personalities are cogent case of inherent trait’s dominance.
Overall, I mostly agree with the prompt that external situations and factors influence our behavior greatly. Examples of women’s role in earlier society and social media in present time shows this effectively. However, extreme personalities do exist such as Adolf Hitler and Gandhi ji who were unconventional in their choices.
- Government officials should rely on their own judgment rather than unquestioningly carry out the will of the people they serve 62
- People s behaviour is largely determined by forces not of their own making 58
- People s attitudes are determined more by their immidiate situation or surroundings than by society as a whole 16
- In this age of intensive media coverage it is no longer possible for a society to regard any living man or woman as a hero 50
- Nations should pass laws to preserve any remaining wilderness areas in their natural state even if these areas could be developed for economic gain 54
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 95, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'In the past'?
Suggestion: In the past
.... History serves us many such examples. In past, society’s view towards women were very...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, however, if, moreover, so, well, for instance, such as, as a result, first of all, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.5258426966 123% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 12.4196629213 24% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 14.8657303371 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 11.3162921348 186% => OK
Pronoun: 44.0 33.0505617978 133% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 69.0 58.6224719101 118% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 12.9106741573 178% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2980.0 2235.4752809 133% => OK
No of words: 546.0 442.535393258 123% => OK
Chars per words: 5.45787545788 5.05705443957 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83390555256 4.55969084622 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82684461256 2.79657885939 101% => OK
Unique words: 311.0 215.323595506 144% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.569597069597 0.4932671777 115% => OK
syllable_count: 937.8 704.065955056 133% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 6.24550561798 176% => OK
Article: 1.0 4.99550561798 20% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 39.0 20.2370786517 193% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 23.0359550562 61% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 34.7531919743 60.3974514979 58% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 76.4102564103 118.986275619 64% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.0 23.4991977007 60% => More words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 3.20512820513 5.21951772744 61% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.97078651685 121% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 10.2758426966 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 5.13820224719 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 16.0 4.83258426966 331% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0615200723894 0.243740707755 25% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0127030625307 0.0831039109588 15% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0329583255685 0.0758088955206 43% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0368155918179 0.150359130593 24% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0384494745308 0.0667264976115 58% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.3 14.1392134831 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 48.81 48.8420337079 100% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.1743820225 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.8 12.1639044944 113% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.39 8.38706741573 112% => OK
difficult_words: 175.0 100.480337079 174% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 5.5 11.8971910112 46% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.6 11.2143820225 68% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.7820224719 85% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.