The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of video rental stores.
"In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore's ten video rental stores. Since we are famous for bargains, raising our rental price is not a viable option to improve profits. Last month our store in downtown Martson significantly decreased it's operating expenses by closing at 6:00pm rather than 9:00pm and by reducing it's stock by eliminationg all movies released more than five years ago. Therefore, in order to increase profits without jeopardising our reputation for offering great movies at low prices, we recommend implementing similar changes in other nine Movie Galore stores."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The author of the argument posits that the operating time of their stores must be reduced so that they could make more profit which was recently declining. He supports this argument with the premise of one of their ten stores which significantly reduced the operating expenses by reducing the operating time and the stock. The argument looks plausible on a cursory look but a deeper scrutiny demarcates loopholes and demands certain evidence to make the argument sound.
Firstly, did the the store in downtown Martson significantly increase it's profit by curtailing the operating time and cost? Author does not mention anything about the sales of the Martson downtown store. It is quite plausible that though the store might have save significantly in the operating expense but their profit would not have increased because of low sales in the low operating time. Moreover, the store might have incurred profits lower than their previous months due to the lower inventories. Therefore, the author must present an exhaustive financial analysis with the comparision of it's sale in atleast the previous 10 to 20 months. This would give a good estimate of how significantly the author's idea work to increase profit.
Even if the Marston downtown store runs profitably for the previous moth, how does it ensure that the other stores would too? Is it not feasible that Marston people are daytime people and the evenings are sales are generally and exceptionally low only in the Marston region? Maybe the other stores have a much higher share of customers flowing in during the evening time after the office hours which might not be the case in the Marston. Marston might be a town of relatively old and retired people who have time during the day to fetch movies while in the other areas, the evening time might be the busiest. Also, it is quite feasible that the people in Marston does not have demand for movies much older than five years, but this might not be the case everywhere. Thus, the author must evince substantial proof that Marston town culture, demographics, and people are very much analogous to the places and people where other ten stores are.
Also, even if we consider that Marston downtown is similar to all the other ten location of the stores, are the customers at Marston satisfied with the reduced inventories and operating time? Nowhere does the author mention how the customers there feel about this change. Are they disappointed and this change is inconvinient to them or they are ok with the new store policy. The author must conduct a survey representative of the customers in Marston to show that majority of them are happy with the change. If the customer is not satisfied or finds the timings inconvinient, the jeopardy is higher than that of losing reputation by increasing cost. The company might end up loosing it's customer base!
In sum, the argument should be substantiated by answering the above questions with the pertinent piece of evidence. Until then, we must be skeptic of the claim and not take a step as risky as that of reducing much significant business hours and inventory of the company outlets.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 14, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...ake the argument sound. Firstly, did the the store in downtown Martson significantly...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 14, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...ake the argument sound. Firstly, did the the store in downtown Martson significantly...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 260, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'saved'.
Suggestion: saved
...usible that though the store might have save significantly in the operating expense ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 704, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
... good estimate of how significantly the authors idea work to increase profit. Even i...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 347, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...uch higher share of customers flowing in during the evening time after the office...
^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'firstly', 'if', 'look', 'may', 'moreover', 'so', 'then', 'therefore', 'thus', 'while']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.258802816901 0.25644967241 101% => OK
Verbs: 0.132042253521 0.15541462614 85% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0862676056338 0.0836205057962 103% => OK
Adverbs: 0.068661971831 0.0520304965353 132% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0334507042254 0.0272364105082 123% => OK
Prepositions: 0.119718309859 0.125424944231 95% => OK
Participles: 0.0264084507042 0.0416121511921 63% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.57021372185 2.79052419416 92% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0158450704225 0.026700313972 59% => OK
Particles: 0.00176056338028 0.001811407834 97% => OK
Determiners: 0.133802816901 0.113004496875 118% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0299295774648 0.0255425247493 117% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0140845070423 0.0127820249294 110% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3151.0 2731.13054187 115% => OK
No of words: 530.0 446.07635468 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.94528301887 6.12365571057 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.79809637944 4.57801047555 105% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.343396226415 0.378187486979 91% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.260377358491 0.287650121315 91% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.17358490566 0.208842608468 83% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0981132075472 0.135150697306 73% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.57021372185 2.79052419416 92% => OK
Unique words: 234.0 207.018472906 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.441509433962 0.469332199767 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 51.2024385538 52.1807786196 98% => OK
How many sentences: 23.0 20.039408867 115% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0434782609 23.2022227129 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.0347972973 57.7814097925 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 137.0 141.986410481 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0434782609 23.2022227129 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.565217391304 0.724660767414 78% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 3.58251231527 140% => OK
Readability: 49.0812141099 51.9672348444 94% => OK
Elegance: 1.72932330827 1.8405768891 94% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.358948830424 0.441005458295 81% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.160445229318 0.135418324435 118% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.092668360303 0.0829849096947 112% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.61864869511 0.58762219726 105% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.115339434733 0.147661913831 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.167608459998 0.193483328276 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0617788819673 0.0970749176394 64% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.506043160533 0.42659136922 119% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0677673210802 0.0774707102158 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.266567724397 0.312017818177 85% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0161242818859 0.0698173142475 23% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.33743842365 108% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 6.87684729064 145% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.82512315271 83% => OK
Positive topic words: 8.0 6.46551724138 124% => OK
Negative topic words: 10.0 5.36822660099 186% => OK
Neutral topic words: 3.0 2.82389162562 106% => OK
Total topic words: 21.0 14.657635468 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.