The following appeared as part of a recommendation from the financial planning office to the administration of Fern Valley University.
"In the past few years, Fern Valley University has suffered from a decline in both enrollments and admissions applications. The reason can be discovered from our students, who most often cite poor teaching and inadequate library resources as their chief sources of dissatisfaction with Fern Valley. Therefore, in order to increase the number of students attending our university, and hence to regain our position as the most prestigious university in the greater Fern Valley metropolitan area, it is necessary to initiate a fund-raising campaign among the alumni that will enable us to expand the range of subjects we teach and to increase the size of our library facilities."
In the light of the above mentioned argument it can said that Fern Valley University is loosing its position and popularity in terms of enrollment and admission process among students due to the lack in teaching capability of the teachers and also the paucity in library resources as per the citation from students .The potential solution for this decline of popularity of Fern Valley University as suggested in the above context could be the Fund that can be gathered from its alumni which will help it to regain its prestige and it will become able compete with the other prestigious universities.
Now some questions may arise in this context which proceeds as follows what if even after the fund raising campaign the teachers of the Fern Valley University will not succeed to fulfil students doubts regarding the subjects.This problem can be solved by developing an impartial and strict boards for the recruitment of the teachers as by meticulously choosing the teachers even with little fund also better teacher can be recruited.
The next question comes from the mentioned potential solution as more funding will enable the expansion of range of subjects it does not necessarily insinuate that students are not participating in the enrollment or admission process as the range of subject is limited in Fern Valley University, if it is assumed that the claim made by the students which consists of lacking in the teaching ability and dearth of library resources are true.
Then the discussion regarding the library facility it can be questioned that whether the size of the library is of foremost reason due to which it is unable to provide better resources and only by increasing the size of the library this problem can be potentially overcome. In a moderate size library also by employing better resources in a effective way the problem can be solved.
Thus in order to compete with the top ranked universities , Fern Valley University should not only have to raised the fund in order the expand the range of subjects and to increase the library size it must also learn how the use the fund effectively so that with suitable funds they can fulfil their student needs and the remaining funds they can use for the university and its students welfare.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2019-10-03 | samyadipsarkar | 77 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
0No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 7 15
No. of Words: 381 350
No. of Characters: 1862 1500
No. of Different Words: 169 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.418 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.887 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.629 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 138 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 111 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 54.429 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 25.207 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.857 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.476 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.837 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.085 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 53, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: 'say'
Suggestion: say
... of the above mentioned argument it can said that Fern Valley University is loosing...
^^^^
Line 1, column 62, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...bove mentioned argument it can said that Fern Valley University is loosing its po...
^^
Line 1, column 125, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...y is loosing its position and popularity in terms of enrollment and admission pro...
^^
Line 1, column 186, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ent and admission process among students due to the lack in teaching capability o...
^^
Line 1, column 318, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ources as per the citation from students .The potential solution for this decline ...
^^
Line 1, column 320, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...rces as per the citation from students .The potential solution for this decline of ...
^^^
Line 3, column 226, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: This
... students doubts regarding the subjects.This problem can be solved by developing an ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 159, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...bjects it does not necessarily insinuate that students are not participating in t...
^^
Line 7, column 51, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...iscussion regarding the library facility it can be questioned that whether the si...
^^
Line 7, column 289, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...n be potentially overcome. In a moderate size library also by employing better re...
^^
Line 7, column 339, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a effective way" with adverb for "effective"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...rary also by employing better resources in a effective way the problem can be solved. Thus in o...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 342, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...y also by employing better resources in a effective way the problem can be solved...
^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...ective way the problem can be solved. Thus in order to compete with the top ranke...
^^^^
Line 9, column 5, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ve way the problem can be solved. Thus in order to compete with the top ranked ...
^^
Line 9, column 59, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...compete with the top ranked universities , Fern Valley University should not only ...
^^
Line 9, column 134, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...t only have to raised the fund in order the expand the range of subjects and to increase t...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 375, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...unds they can use for the university and its students welfare.
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, if, may, regarding, so, then, thus
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 55.5748502994 99% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1887.0 2260.96107784 83% => OK
No of words: 380.0 441.139720559 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.96578947368 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.41515443553 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68765122618 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 170.0 204.123752495 83% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.447368421053 0.468620217663 95% => OK
syllable_count: 597.6 705.55239521 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 2.0 8.76447105788 23% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 6.0 19.7664670659 30% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 63.0 22.8473053892 276% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 153.416010319 57.8364921388 265% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 314.5 119.503703932 263% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 63.3333333333 23.324526521 272% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 6.66666666667 5.70786347227 117% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 17.0 5.25449101796 324% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.149155112551 0.218282227539 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0779677229896 0.0743258471296 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0676057975425 0.0701772020484 96% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0935612675875 0.128457276422 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0634484108143 0.0628817314937 101% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 33.6 14.3799401198 234% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: 7.53 48.3550499002 16% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 13.0 7.1628742515 181% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 27.9 12.197005988 229% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 12.43 12.5979740519 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.29 8.32208582834 124% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 98.500998004 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 57.0 12.3882235529 460% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 27.2 11.1389221557 244% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.