the following is a recommendation from the Board of Directors of Monarch Books.
"We recommend that Monarch Books open a café in its store. Monarch, having been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer base because it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Clearly, opening the café would attract more customers. Space could be made for the café by discontinuing the children's book section, which will probably become less popular given that the most recent national census indicated a significant decline in the percentage of the population under age ten. Opening a café will allow Monarch to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Books, which recently opened its own café."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The board of directors of Monarch Books have recommended to open a café, which they concluded will attract more customers base than now. They need to answer some questions before recommending this.
Firstly, change in business plan model doesn't decrease the customer base? Despite, book store having large customer base ,there is no guarantee of future success. Changing business model might give negative outcome on customer number. Rating customer satisfaction helps to correlate changes with success or failure.
Secondly, discontinuing children section a wise move? there is possibility that this section is most visited section, many parents visit Monarch Books because of large availability of children book. Discontinuation has direct influence on the parents visiting this book store. This discontinuation is based on the national census report that the number of children below 10 is decreasing. Not all person in children section are necessarily children below 10. If this is true, then opening café to influence customer seems absurd.
Finally, Opening café based on opponent regal book store seems myopic. This Regal book might attract another base of customer. Without analyzing the similarity between these book stores, their type of customer base, idea of opening café seems unwise. there is probability customers aren't interested on drinking coffee, they visit this store because of its wide choice on books. They might start café only after analyzing needs and desires of customer instead of imitating another books store. If either of these has merit, then conclusion in original is weakened.
In conclusion, the argument as it stands now, is considerably flaw due to several unwarranted assumption. if author is able to answer these above question and offer more evidence, then it will be possible to check feasibility of proposed recommendation to open a café.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 294 350
No. of Characters: 1550 1500
No. of Different Words: 170 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.141 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.272 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.723 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 115 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 93 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 62 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.294 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.414 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.353 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.32 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.32 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.095 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 40, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
... Firstly, change in business plan model doesnt decrease the customer base? Despite, b...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 121, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...e, book store having large customer base ,there is no guarantee of future success....
^^
Line 2, column 187, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... future success. Changing business model might give negative outcome on customer ...
^^
Line 3, column 54, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...ontinuing children section a wise move? there is possibility that this section is mos...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 251, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...ase, idea of opening café seems unwise. there is probability customers arent interes...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 282, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: aren't
... unwise. there is probability customers arent interested on drinking coffee, they vi...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 287, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...se. there is probability customers arent interested on drinking coffee, they visi...
^^
Line 5, column 63, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'flawed'.
Suggestion: flawed
...ument as it stands now, is considerably flaw due to several unwarranted assumption. ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 107, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
...due to several unwarranted assumption. if author is able to answer these above qu...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, then, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.9520958084 46% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 11.1786427146 27% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 3.0 13.6137724551 22% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 55.5748502994 74% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1599.0 2260.96107784 71% => OK
No of words: 292.0 441.139720559 66% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.47602739726 5.12650576532 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.13376432452 4.56307096286 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74749540494 2.78398813304 99% => OK
Unique words: 176.0 204.123752495 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.602739726027 0.468620217663 129% => OK
syllable_count: 502.2 705.55239521 71% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 2.0 8.76447105788 23% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 22.8473053892 61% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 31.6241600679 57.8364921388 55% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 79.95 119.503703932 67% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.6 23.324526521 63% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.5 5.70786347227 61% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.297341922164 0.218282227539 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0867319612495 0.0743258471296 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0898406499043 0.0701772020484 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.168418720789 0.128457276422 131% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0937593400219 0.0628817314937 149% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.7 14.3799401198 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 48.81 48.3550499002 101% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.91 12.5979740519 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.33 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 98.500998004 75% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 12.3882235529 48% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.6 11.1389221557 68% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.