"The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition."
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Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
The statement made by the speaker about the leadership quality seems quite appropriate in its context that to prepare the young people for leadership in various organizations one of the easiest way is to incorporate a sense of cooperation in them rather than a sense of competition as a leader is supposed to gather up the potential of its group and efficiently put into use which can never be achieved by competing with others . Often times the leader is the one maintains a healthy environment by maintaining the unity of the group . It is more of a question of constructive or destructive attitude towards the work . As is quite evident that "competition " being a destructive trait would hinder the growth of the group/organization while the sense of cooperation in the leader can certainly be a driving force for the organization to grow.
A society should prepare its individuals for leadership in order for its growth and harmony. Leadership in the industry is necessary in order for its growth for which the individuals should aspire to become one. As these leaders of the world do enrich our potential by instilling hope to achieve things that were previously unachievable which often intellectually burgeons the society. This do create better opportunities for the upcoming generations to contribute to society and give a hand in its development. From wooden wheel to automobiles running on engine seems a long way that the society has traveled in its course of development,which has been achieved thruogh the vision of these leaders of the corporate world.In a way these leaders influence the economical landscape of the world.One may still argue that in order to imbibe the leadership quality, one need not instill the sense of cooperation alone but other factors do play a role .Albiet other factors do certainly play role but this factor alone plays a major role as the leaders often have to manage and deal with people and this constructive attitude can bring them towards success.
A competitive environment mostly hinders the potential of people to work with their full capability as a large chunk of energy is directed towards demeaning the other competitors which if utilized in constructive fashion can certainly be helpful for the organization.But at the same time it can be questioned that this competitive spirit do pushes the individuals to greater things as seen from the experiences of the market where competitors do come up with innovative solutions to ensure their survivle in the market . But a further question that can be counter asked is the extent of competition that is healthy for any organisation as a cut throat competition will make the corporates a money munching machine rather than working for the betterment of the society.
So all in all the statement as put forth by the speaker is quite approprite and needs certain touchup on some grounds which if incorporated will conspicously strengthen the base of the statement as proposed.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 375, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...f its group and efficiently put into use which can never be achieved by competing...
^^
Line 1, column 429, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ver be achieved by competing with others . Often times the leader is the one maint...
^^
Line 1, column 535, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...nt by maintaining the unity of the group . It is more of a question of constructiv...
^^
Line 1, column 619, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...or destructive attitude towards the work . As is quite evident that 'competit...
^^
Line 5, column 213, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ndividuals should aspire to become one. As these leaders of the world do enrich ou...
^^
Line 5, column 534, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'automobile'.
Suggestion: automobile
...n its development. From wooden wheel to automobiles running on engine seems a long way that...
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Line 5, column 639, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , which
...as traveled in its course of development,which has been achieved thruogh the vision of...
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Line 5, column 723, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: In
...of these leaders of the corporate world.In a way these leaders influence the econo...
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Line 5, column 794, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: One
...e the economical landscape of the world.One may still argue that in order to imbibe...
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Line 5, column 946, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...n alone but other factors do play a role .Albiet other factors do certainly play r...
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Line 5, column 948, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Albiet
...alone but other factors do play a role .Albiet other factors do certainly play role bu...
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Line 9, column 186, Rule ID: IF_IS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'is'?
Suggestion: is
...s demeaning the other competitors which if utilized in constructive fashion can ce...
^^
Line 9, column 268, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: But
...rtainly be helpful for the organization.But at the same time it can be questioned t...
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Line 9, column 519, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...s to ensure their survivle in the market . But a further question that can be coun...
^^
Line 9, column 697, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...etition will make the corporates a money munching machine rather than working for...
^^
Line 13, column 125, Rule ID: IF_IS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'is'?
Suggestion: is
...s certain touchup on some grounds which if incorporated will conspicously strength...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, if, may, so, still, then, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.5258426966 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.4196629213 105% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 14.8657303371 74% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.3162921348 133% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 33.0505617978 88% => OK
Preposition: 67.0 58.6224719101 114% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 12.9106741573 170% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2514.0 2235.4752809 112% => OK
No of words: 492.0 442.535393258 111% => OK
Chars per words: 5.10975609756 5.05705443957 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.70967865282 4.55969084622 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.11568004074 2.79657885939 111% => OK
Unique words: 230.0 215.323595506 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.467479674797 0.4932671777 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 801.9 704.065955056 114% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 6.24550561798 32% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 20.2370786517 59% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 41.0 23.0359550562 178% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 175.963597088 60.3974514979 291% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 209.5 118.986275619 176% => OK
Words per sentence: 41.0 23.4991977007 174% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.0 5.21951772744 57% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 16.0 7.80617977528 205% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 10.2758426966 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.226826325475 0.243740707755 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0946843431281 0.0831039109588 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0781638434063 0.0758088955206 103% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.123579044371 0.150359130593 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0709624723028 0.0667264976115 106% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 23.1 14.1392134831 163% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 29.86 48.8420337079 61% => OK
smog_index: 13.0 7.92365168539 164% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 19.3 12.1743820225 159% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.25 12.1639044944 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.98 8.38706741573 107% => OK
difficult_words: 103.0 100.480337079 103% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 11.8971910112 160% => OK
gunning_fog: 18.4 11.2143820225 164% => OK
text_standard: 19.0 11.7820224719 161% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.