During a recent plane journey you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants Write a letter to this businessman In your letter rem

Essay topics:

During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants.

Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter:
- remind him when and where you met
- tell him what kind of job you are interested in
- say why you think you would be suitable for the job

Dear Sir,
I am writing to you regarding our conversation when we flew together in a recent plane journey. As you may recall, I talked about my work experience and aspirations in my professional career.
I would like to confirm that I am interested in finance, where I have plenty of experience in accounting, and budgeting. As commented in our chat, I am looking for new challenges in the finance field where I can contribute to the new expansion of projects you mentioned.
I participated in some projects in the last 10 years, where I implemented a shared service center, helping organizations to understand their process, and reducing costs on certain areas within finance, such as accounting, forecasting. Thus, efforts by centralizing those areas in one, would benefit decisions taken from the management in regards to all finances.
This is only one example where I can contribute for the company strategy. I do have more information about it; therefore, I would like to ask you for an appointment next week to discuss in more detail’s information mentioned above.
I Look forward to hearing from you soon.
Sincerely yours,
Phil Collins
Mobile 766478344

Votes
Average: 8.1 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 255, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tribute to the new expansion of projects you mentioned. I participated in some p...
^^
Line 4, column 335, Rule ID: IN_REGARD_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'regarding' or 'with regard to'.
Suggestion: regarding; with regard to
...fit decisions taken from the management in regards to all finances. This is only one example...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, look, may, regarding, so, therefore, thus, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 1.0 7.48453608247 13% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 4.92783505155 122% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 5.05154639175 59% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 3.03092783505 198% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 32.9175257732 88% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 26.3917525773 125% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 3.85567010309 259% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 984.0 937.175257732 105% => OK
No of words: 192.0 206.0 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.125 4.54256449028 113% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.72241943641 3.78020617076 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.11064410867 2.54303337028 122% => OK
Unique words: 124.0 127.690721649 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.645833333333 0.622605031667 104% => OK
syllable_count: 306.9 290.88556701 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.41237113402 113% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.13402061856 99% => OK
Article: 0.0 0.824742268041 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.83505154639 109% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.463917525773 431% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 0.0 1.44329896907 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 12.6804123711 79% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 16.3608247423 116% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.6347874527 44.8134815571 122% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.4 76.5299724578 129% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.2 16.8248392259 114% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.5 4.34317383033 127% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.29896907216 116% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 2.54639175258 79% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 7.41237113402 94% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.49484536082 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.94845360825 76% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.145493483705 0.216113520407 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0561886368632 0.0766984524023 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0508074178744 0.0603063233224 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0869316554241 0.12726935374 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0628251409412 0.0580467560999 108% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 8.37731958763 147% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 70.7449484536 74% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 3.82989690722 230% => Smog_index is high.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 7.45979381443 143% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.47 8.71597938144 143% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.86 7.59969072165 117% => OK
difficult_words: 52.0 41.2886597938 126% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 8.62886597938 133% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 8.54432989691 112% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 8.15463917526 147% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 81.4606741573 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.25 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.