In some countries young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of pressure to work hard in their studies. What do you think are the cause and solution
Advancement in lifestyle has invite several threateing problem. Presently, short leisure time is supposed to be the biggest problem in some countries because all young people do toil hard for achieving more and more. Here, i would like to throw light on cause and measure remedies to address this worrying concern.
Numerous cause can be put down for this problem. First and foremost the role of population to encourage the young people for doing hard work in study is gigantic. For example, unemployment spreading its roots due to population, thus young people want to get supreme job in future time, as a result they toil hard to shine their name. Moreover, the vital function to encourage the people time work is played by inflation. For example, youngester eke- out more money to complete their need and inflation has got in the nevies in the people, consequently they feel stress in their mind and have short free time.
In addition, in some countries , having high countries , having high degree of university is a value, therefore they do hard to good job because if they have a good degree that can not find a good job, as a result young people more busy in study. What is more, people want to out do for other people in the achievement because people creat stiff competition in every field, therefore people face a lot pressure in their life.
Several remedial measure can be taken to vanish this global concern. Firstly, government should make a law about size of family so that control the population. For example, people have one child in china country. Moreover, government ought to establish more industries where young people attain good job in easily way. These some step people get rid of stress their mind.
To recapitulate, i think we should create a balance between the time of studying, working and free time because every person take rest for healthy life, so leisure time is very important for our body and brain.
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| 2019-11-24 | Eliii | 84 | view |
| 2015-05-27 | gur | 80 | view |
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| 2015-01-03 | Razif Azhari | 50 | view |
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Advancement in lifestyle has invite several threateing problem
Advancement in lifestyle has invited several threatening problems
unemployment spreading its roots due to population
unemployment is spreading its roots due to population
because if they have a good degree that can not find a good job, as a result young people more busy in study.
Description: can you re-write this sentence?
Sentence: Moreover, the vital function to encourage the people time work is played by inflation.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to people and time
in easily way.
in an easy way.
Sentence: These some step people get rid of stress their mind.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by a determiner, possessive
Suggestion: Refer to stress and their
Sentence: To recapitulate, i think we should create a balance between the time of studying, working and free time because every person take rest for healthy life, so leisure time is very important for our body and brain.
Description: The fragment person take rest is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace take with verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Sentence: Advancement in lifestyle has invite several threateing problem.
Error: threateing Suggestion: threatening
Sentence: For example, youngester eke- out more money to complete their need and inflation has got in the nevies in the people, consequently they feel stress in their mind and have short free time.
Error: youngester Suggestion: youngster
Error: nevies Suggestion: envies
Sentence: What is more, people want to out do for other people in the achievement because people creat stiff competition in every field, therefore people face a lot pressure in their life.
Error: creat Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
Read a good grammar book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 332 350
No. of Characters: 1561 1500
No. of Different Words: 172 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.269 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.702 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.383 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 106 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 72 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 44 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.75 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.278 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.625 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.33 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.562 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.066 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5