Do you agree or disagree with the statement that skill to relate well to people is more important rather than studying hard in school?
By and large, we are surrounded by a plethora of occupation these days. It stands to reason that any career which one chooses has a significant effect on their future. To explain, s/he can make a sought-after life and rectify their problems better. Consequently, one's job plays a key role in his or her successful in one's life. When it comes to this point, people have some debates as to what ability make people more successful in their career. One noteworthy point of view is that the skill to relate well to people is more important rather than studying hard in school. I disagree with this statement and in what follows, two reasons will be discussed to shed light on this idea.
First and foremost, one can gain more efficient experiences. It is evident that nowadays, universities are full of professional professors who have a great view of experiences. Moreover, we are living in an era accessing easily to a variety of books, plenty of websites, and movies about some best experiences. Consequently, these facilities lead us not to reinvent the wheel; by that I mean one can utilize and learn their experience without self-trying, but In comparison, those who were not studying hard enough should pass a process of trial and error to discover what experience is the best. Take, for instance, an 18-year-old guy who has entered university recently. He is so diligent and if he tries so hard before getting graduated, he is able to aggregate a score of best experiences in his field. Therefore, after the graduation, not only can these experiences work as superiority over other competitors for a job, but also After taking that job, he can promote faster because his boss sees his potential and experience that other newcomers have not.
The second noteworthy point to say about this idea that studying hard during school prompts one's success in their future job is that they can make a better network in the businesses. These days, if professors do not have their own business, they have an efficient connection with some businesses. In light of trying hard in school, one becomes known among the faculty of the university. With these in mind, one can have a better relationship with their professors that this causes a good network with the businesses. To illustrate this, a research conducted by a bunch of Ph.D. students in the John Hopkins University reveals that if a professor wants to offer a high-value job opportunity, s/he would like to offer to a person that is known as a hard worker. This shows that if a person works hard in a school, he incidentally make a good network with the businesses via the professors.
In short, the analysis of the aforementioned ideas brings us to the conclusion that by studying hard in a school, one becomes more successful in a job. This is because only does one gain more efficient experiences, but also it causes to make a good business network. Thus, we hope that the government tries to create an education system which persuades one to study hard in schools.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 264, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...fy their problems better. Consequently, ones job plays a key role in his or her succ...
^^^^
Line 1, column 318, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
... a key role in his or her successful in ones life. When it comes to this point, peop...
^^^^
Line 3, column 93, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...hat studying hard during school prompts ones success in their future job is that the...
^^^^
Line 3, column 561, Rule ID: A_LOT_OF_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun Ph seems to be countable; consider using: 'a bunch of (Ph)'.
Suggestion: a bunch of (Ph)
...llustrate this, a research conducted by a bunch of Ph.D. students in the John Hopkins Univers...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 828, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'makes'.
Suggestion: makes
...works hard in a school, he incidentally make a good network with the businesses via ...
^^^^
Line 4, column 234, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'making'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'cause' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: making
...ficient experiences, but also it causes to make a good business network. Thus, we hope ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, if, incidentally, moreover, second, so, therefore, thus, well, as to, for instance, i mean, in short, by and large
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 11.0286738351 181% => OK
Pronoun: 60.0 43.0788530466 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 75.0 52.1666666667 144% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2503.0 1977.66487455 127% => OK
No of words: 520.0 407.700716846 128% => OK
Chars per words: 4.81346153846 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.77530192783 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82563746277 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 253.0 212.727598566 119% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.486538461538 0.524837075471 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 789.3 618.680645161 128% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.4864165759 48.9658058833 117% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.826086957 100.406767564 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.6086956522 20.6045352989 110% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.34782608696 5.45110844103 116% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 19.0 11.8709677419 160% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.20914448073 0.236089414692 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0663553920806 0.076458572812 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.107487733171 0.0737576698707 146% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.136509333761 0.150856017488 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0755092703297 0.0645574589148 117% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.5 11.7677419355 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.91 10.9000537634 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.89 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 86.8835125448 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.