The luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals.
The argument in which the luxuries of the today life causes that people have no strong and independent characters is debatable from various views. Although the convenience of the modern time has brought people more welfare and equipment, there are lots of difficulties that cause challenges and problems. Likewise, the wealth and welfare won't be achieved, unless through tremendous attempts made by the independent individuals. The common wealth and facilities which have achieved by the endeavor over lots of years can pave the rest of way for more development and new technologies.
First, in spite of the today facilities, there are tremendous problems which can make people more tenacious through dealing with. As we can recognize, people are involved with issues, dilemmas, and numerous adventures as much as they had in the past. For example, making money is not an easy work because of the overpopulation and the burdensome competition, so that people are finding a decent job for many years. So, individuals bear hard problems, although they are not the same as those were in the past. Most of issues such as the education away from hometown, finding job, and making family are undeniably hard and important for forming the characters of the people now.
Second, the facilities and equipment gained in the modern time are the achievements of the men who were independent and diligent. By tremendous attempts, the individuals could have created the world where we can live freely, easily now. It is obvious for everyone that convenience doesn't be earned without the difficulties. Suppose for example, how much we should endure the hardiness for getting a degree or certification which is necessary for taking a position in the community. After reaching the progression, money, and facilities, we will be trying to convey that motivation and experiences for our children. No doubt, we have become stubborn and stable after passing the time of difficulties.
However, we are aware of the families who have been living easily without smallest problems, so that it has caused they don't be serious and persistent in front of the predicament. People who have grown in the luxurious family are able to enjoy all of the equipment of the modern life and cannot stand the problems. These one's characters are sensitive, emotional and vulnerable. They can be easily disturbed by the accidental events and adventure which aren't their interests.
As a result, the contemporary life with all its convenience still is accompanied by the problems which are enough to form independent individuals. Furthermore, in spite of the amenity in the modern time, welfare and facilities aren't achieved without the great attempts, since population is increasing while having limited equipment.
- tpo18 80
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- 152. Many parts of the world are losing important natural resources, such as forests, animals, or clean water Choose one resource that is disappearing and explain why it needs to be saved Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. 97
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- Writing integrated - TPO 27 75
flaws:
Duplicate words or sentences. Look:
No. of Words: 451 while No. of Different Words: 219
Still need to improve the language, like this sentence:
'so that it has caused they don't be serious and persistent in front of the predicament'.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 451 350
No. of Characters: 2277 1500
No. of Different Words: 219 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.608 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.049 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.801 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 167 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 121 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 65 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.476 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.762 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.524 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.305 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.513 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.116 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5