The following appeared in a memo from the vice president of a food distribution company with food storage warehouses in several cities.”
“Recently, we signed a contract with the Fly-Away Pest Control Company to provide pest control services at our fast-food warehouse in Palm City, but last month we discovered that over $20,000 worth of food there had been destroyed by pest damage. Meanwhile, the Buzzoff Pest Control Company, which we have used for many years, continued to service our warehouse in Wintervale, and last month only $10,000 worth
of the food stored there had been destroyed by pest damage. Even though the price charged by Fly-Away is considerably lower, our best means of saving money is to return to Buzzoff for all our pest control services.”
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The vice president of a food distribution company return to Buzzoff Pest Control for their control services.To make the claim more convincing, several assumptions in the argument in the argument need supports.
Last month, the vice president discovered that over $20,000 worth of food at fast-food warehouse in Palm City had been destroyed by pest damage.Meanwhile the buzz off Pest Control lost $10,000 worth of food.However, the assumption of the weather is comparable is doubtful.For example, the weather may be warmer in Palm City than in the Wintervale.Pest prefers to live in a warmer and humid place.Pest may seem to be a serious problem in Palm CIty, and a loss go $20,000 worth of food could be rather common.In the contrast, if the weather in Wintervale is cold and dry, then there would no acute problem of pest.Moreover, the lost of $10,000 could be a serious problem of food storages.
Even if the weather did not affect the damage, the assumption of the same amount of food storage is still doubtful.As there might be more amount of food in Palm City than in the Wintervale.If the food distribution company put more food in Palm City, and it is likely that Fly-Away Pest Control lost $10,000 worth of food more than Buzzoff Pest Control.
The author only use the last month’s data to improve that Buzzoff company is better than Fly-Away.However, this assumption is unwarranted because things rarely remain the same over extended period of time.The fact that happened last month is not a sound evidence to draw a conclusion that Fly-Away Pest Control will lost double worth of food ever month.For instance, it might be a spacial case and Fly-Away Pest Control did there job very well except last month.
The author claims that the price charges by Fly-Away Pest Control is considerably lower ,but they still think that Buzzoff can save the money.If the price charged by Buzzoff are considerably higher than the loss they can save, then the returning to the Buzzoff will not help company to increase profits.For example, if the Buzzoff charge $50,000 for their service per month ,the company is still losing $40,000 by choosing Buzzoff.Therefore, the company should conduct a through cost benefit analysis so that the readers can know whether turning to Buzzoff will save more money or not.
To make the assumption of the argument more convincing, the author would have to provide more information/as above mentioned.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 8 15
No. of Words: 422 350
No. of Characters: 1972 1500
No. of Different Words: 183 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.532 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.673 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.34 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 137 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 104 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 52.75 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 28.07 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.468 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.87 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.178 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 109, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: To
...Pest Control for their control services.To make the claim more convincing, several...
^^
Line 3, column 143, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Meanwhile
... City had been destroyed by pest damage.Meanwhile the buzz off Pest Control lost 0,000 wo...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 143, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Meanwhile,
... City had been destroyed by pest damage.Meanwhile the buzz off Pest Control lost 0,000 wo...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 204, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
...f Pest Control lost 0,000 worth of food.However, the assumption of the weather is compa...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 269, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: For
...f the weather is comparable is doubtful.For example, the weather may be warmer in P...
^^^
Line 3, column 344, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Pest
...mer in Palm City than in the Wintervale.Pest prefers to live in a warmer and humid p...
^^^^
Line 3, column 393, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Pest
...ers to live in a warmer and humid place.Pest may seem to be a serious problem in Pal...
^^^^
Line 3, column 502, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: In
...00 worth of food could be rather common.In the contrast, if the weather in Winterv...
^^
Line 3, column 607, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Moreover
...en there would no acute problem of pest.Moreover, the lost of 0,000 could be a serious p...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 116, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: As
...mount of food storage is still doubtful.As there might be more amount of food in P...
^^
Line 5, column 116, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...mount of food storage is still doubtful.As there might be more amount of food in P...
^^
Line 5, column 190, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: If
...ood in Palm City than in the Wintervale.If the food distribution company put more ...
^^
Line 5, column 324, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...st Control lost 0,000 worth of food more than Buzzoff Pest Control. The author...
^^
Line 7, column 99, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
...Buzzoff company is better than Fly-Away.However, this assumption is unwarranted because...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 191, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...gs rarely remain the same over extended period of time.The fact that happened last month is no...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 206, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...n the same over extended period of time.The fact that happened last month is not a ...
^^^
Line 7, column 317, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'lose'
Suggestion: lose
...clusion that Fly-Away Pest Control will lost double worth of food ever month.For ins...
^^^^
Line 7, column 354, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: For
...ll lost double worth of food ever month.For instance, it might be a spacial case an...
^^^
Line 9, column 88, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...-Away Pest Control is considerably lower ,but they still think that Buzzoff can sa...
^^
Line 9, column 143, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: If
...l think that Buzzoff can save the money.If the price charged by Buzzoff are consid...
^^
Line 9, column 304, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: For
...ll not help company to increase profits.For example, if the Buzzoff charge 0,000 fo...
^^^
Line 9, column 372, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...charge 0,000 for their service per month ,the company is still losing 0,000 by ch...
^^
Line 9, column 407, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...month ,the company is still losing 0,000 by choosing Buzzoff.Therefore, the compa...
^^
Line 9, column 429, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Therefore
...still losing 0,000 by choosing Buzzoff.Therefore, the company should conduct a through c...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 469, Rule ID: THROUGH_THOROUGH[1]
Message: Did you mean 'thorough' (accurate, exhaustive)?
Suggestion: thorough
...Therefore, the company should conduct a through cost benefit analysis so that the reade...
^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 30, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...or not. To make the assumption of the argument more convincing, the author wou...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, may, moreover, so, still, then, therefore, well, while, for example, for instance
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 55.5748502994 88% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2030.0 2260.96107784 90% => OK
No of words: 405.0 441.139720559 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.01234567901 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48604634366 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82156003594 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 182.0 204.123752495 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.449382716049 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 595.8 705.55239521 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 6.0 19.7664670659 30% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 67.0 22.8473053892 293% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 195.126170009 57.8364921388 337% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 338.333333333 119.503703932 283% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 67.5 23.324526521 289% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 16.5 5.70786347227 289% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 26.0 5.25449101796 495% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.88822355289 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.339486561878 0.218282227539 156% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.186580311014 0.0743258471296 251% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.106498762161 0.0701772020484 152% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.186580311014 0.128457276422 145% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.106498762161 0.0628817314937 169% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 35.9 14.3799401198 250% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: 11.93 48.3550499002 25% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 13.0 7.1628742515 181% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 28.2 12.197005988 231% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 12.96 12.5979740519 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.0 8.32208582834 120% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 98.500998004 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 29.0 12.3882235529 234% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 28.8 11.1389221557 259% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.