The following appeared in a memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College.
"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author has stated a possible issue in finding accommodation in future and proposed an idea to overcome it in this memo. According to this passage, the number of students are increasing in every intake and students may face a problem of housing in coming future. But we must consider certain circumstances or conduct certain surveys to evaluate the need of this recommendation.
Author has stated that average rent of off-campus apartment has risen in recent years. That’s why student will prefer on campus housing over off-campus apartment. But there will be an establishment cost to build new dormitories. If the college has to build several dormitories this cost will be much higher and this cost will be added to the housing rent of future students. Now this extra establishment cost over normal rent and maintenance charge can make overall housing fee much higher. If this cost exceeds the average rent of an off-campus apartment, student may not like to take on-campus dormitories.
A survey also must be conducted or data may be taken from respective office to know the native places of students. If there is a large number of students hailing from Buckingham, then there is a less chance student will rent dormitories. They may prefer to come in college from their home. So, the actual need or demand of dormitories must be evaluated before building it.
Now an adequate amount of lands are also needed to new dorms. The amount of free lands in the college also needs to be evaluated and the authority has to make sure that these much of land are sufficient to build new dormitories. But if there is a scarce of land, then cost of acquiring land will also increase the establishment cost of the new dormitories.
The author has predicted number of students are likely to be doubled in next 50 years. Now, 50 years is a large timeline. A lot of change can happen in this 50 years. Many new colleges may grow up in this time period and it may happen that students will prefer those colleges over Buckingham College. This change in trend may bring a futile result to the idea of building new dormitories.
At last, author pointed out that new dormitories will attract prospective students. But a prospective student first research about the quality of education or qualification of faculties provided by the college over accommodation arrangement. Students are more likely to take admission in a college which has better quality of education over attractive dorms.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- can be put on argument 1
argument 4 -- OK
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Need to argue against the conclusion always. For this topic it is:
Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 420 350
No. of Characters: 2017 1500
No. of Different Words: 180 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.527 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.802 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.721 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 146 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 100 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 68 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.923 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.3 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.513 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.114 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 128, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
... native places of students. If there is a large number of students hailing from Buckingham, then ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, may, so, then, as to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 22.0 12.9520958084 170% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 13.6137724551 37% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 70.0 55.5748502994 126% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2065.0 2260.96107784 91% => OK
No of words: 420.0 441.139720559 95% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91666666667 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52701905584 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81481644339 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 185.0 204.123752495 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.440476190476 0.468620217663 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 654.3 705.55239521 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 19.7664670659 121% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.0100927908 57.8364921388 61% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.0416666667 119.503703932 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.5 23.324526521 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.75 5.70786347227 31% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.220523723958 0.218282227539 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0652801212332 0.0743258471296 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.050756561714 0.0701772020484 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.112832770307 0.128457276422 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0318366331105 0.0628817314937 51% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.5 14.3799401198 73% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.96 12.5979740519 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.64 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 98.500998004 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.