Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author of the argument asserts that arctic deer populations have declined due to global warming which makes these animals unable to follow their age-old migration patterns from island to island. This conclusion is buttressed by evidence which should be carefully scrutinized in order to evaluate the argument.
First of all, we were told that the decrease in number of deer coincides with global warming and thus should be caused it. However, correlation does not always mean causation. In fact, some factors which were not taken into consideration by the writer may affect the arctic deer populations. Perhaps we have a deal with a natural pattern, we know for sure that the planet periodically undergoes drastic changes in climate and cold weather may be substituted by warm one. Animals which inhabit the planet should adapt to new environment and if they are not able to do so, they will died out as thousands of species before it. In other words, the natural pattern which leads to increasing sea levels may cause the problem.
Furthermore, the mankind has demonstrated its ability to ruin environment. As we were told the animals consume plants which grow in the arctic regions. Perhaps the humankind activity may cause the shortage of the plants which the wonderful creatures usually consume. For instance, our activity such as unearthing fossil minerals may lead to soul contamination and thus the plants may disappear. Moreover, the plants may be sensitive to air pollution. In both these cases, our action cause the deterioration or destruction of food source of the deer.
Finally, the argument claims that arctic deer are not able to follow the age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea. Perhaps, the animals is not able to do it due to our activity, we may build roads and highway to towns which are located in the region. Or some mills and plants may be built in the arctic region in order to unearth oil or other minerals. Moreover, the deterioration of international relationship may stimulate governments to build military facilities in the region to monitor Russians activity. In all these examples, we impede deer from following its natural migration patterns by creating barriers such as roads or noise and fuss which may feel the animals anxious.
In conclusion, the argument avers that due to global warming the arctic deer are not able to follow their traditional migration ways as a result deer's populations have fallen. However, the author does not manage to recognize some other factors which may lead to the decline as well as to the climate change. Thus, the argument seems to be unwarranted and the real causes of the decline should be studied additionally.
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Comments
Hello. I carefully read the
Hello. I carefully read the essay which you give me as a paragon of a good essay and frankly speaking I do not manage to tackle the argument.
I have to ask you about a favor. May you give an outline of this argument? What are the tree point against which I should argue?
I can see only two out of three and honestly I am not sure that these two are indeed correct.
Let me demonstrate them to you.
1) Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt,
-first of all? should I accept that there is a global warming has impacted on weather conditions? Or I may argue against it?
we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
- this is an easy part: global warming lead to shortage of food or possibility to bring offspring.
Thank you.
for 1) Whether a global
for 1) Whether a global warming has impacted on weather conditions is not related to the decline or not that much.
for 2) you argued wrongly.
The outline is like this:
condition 1:
according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. //maybe illegal hunting is one of the reasons for the decline.
condition 2:
Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, //maybe there are other reasons to cause the decline not the global warming.
conclusion:
we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea. //suppose it is related to global warming, it is still possible for deer to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
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Thank you for the outline and
Thank you for the outline and your answer.
I have more questions about the first condition.
/Frankly speaking it is hard to guess that poaching may be the cause of the decline./
1) The question is: may I assert that, for instance, a virus
or a new animal species which has recently migrated to the region has hunted down deer?
or it is a normal fluctuation of the deer's population?
2) I mean that only poaching is the possible explanation of the report?
3) or the idea is that men's actions led to the disastrous decline?
condition 1:
according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. //maybe illegal hunting is one of the reasons for the decline.
Thank you.
p.s. I accepted this condition without any questions(( So, I am a little bit shocked.
1) no, this is for the
1) no, this is for the argument 2
2) for the report, this is the only excuse
3) yes, you can put anything up to hunters, however, we accept the report is correct
Sentence: Animals which inhabit the planet should adapt to new environment and if they are not able to do so, they will died out as thousands of species before it.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to will and died
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flaws:
Three arguments are duplicated. Need other two arguments. read a sample:
http://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-essays/arctic-deer-live-islands-canadas-…
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Attribute Value Ideal
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Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
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Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.598 4.7
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Sentence Length SD: 6.845 7.5
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Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.317 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.511 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.116 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5