The vice president for human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company's president.
"In an effort to improve our employees' productivity, we should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Internet use from their workstations. Employees who use the Internet inappropriately from their workstations need to be identified and punished if we are to reduce the number of work hours spent on personal or recreational activities, such as shopping or playing games. Installing software on company computers to detect employees' Internet use is the best way to prevent employees from wasting time on the job. It will foster a better work ethic at Climpson and improve our overall profits."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The vice president for human resources at Climpson Industry sent a mail to the company’s president recommending him to implement electronic monitoring of the employees’ Internet usage. He reasons that it is quintessential to reduce the time spent on personal / recreational purposes, thereby increasing productivity and fostering a good work place ethic which will convert into profits. But, before we recommend these points, a few questions need to be answered.
Firstly, the vice president argues that monitoring of employees is essential and so is their punishing in case of any violation. But, are the employees children anymore that they have to be punished?
He adds that it is an important step to curb the personal / recreational activities of the employees. But, is it possible for an employee to work the entire time, each minute they are in office without respite? In fact, working continuously, without any breaks may lead to saturation of the employees’ mindset and in turn affect their efficiency. This is exactly opposite what the vice president aims to achieve. This would greatly dent the efficacy of the implementation of this policy.
Furthermore, he says that it is the best way to prevent employees from wasting time on the job. But, will monitoring their Internet activity stop the employees from going out for a smoke or a snack break and waste time? It is possible that the employees might go out for a while for a break or to drink tea/coffee and end up wasting more time tha what they would have if they could just take a quick break by staying in the office doing some activity that woud help them release stress. This is another reason to consider before coming to a conclusion on this policy.
The vice president is affirmative that this measure will foster a better work ethic and improve the overall profit. But what is the guarantee that the employees aren’t frustrated by this policy? This will in turn throw shade on the policy implemented. Similarly, what is the possibility that the profits will increase due to this? The profits might not increase or may increase due to some other factor like the boom in their sales sector or a huge investment. If this is true, it will greatly undermine his affirmative statement.
So, in conclusion, although it may be a good work ethic, but it’s efficacy cannot be determined unless the above questions are answered, maybe in the form of a survey or research. The questions stated here are important to the overall mental well being of the employees as well as the company and hence should be considered before reaching a conclusion, solely in the hopes of achieving profits. Sometimes, short term solutions can become long term progress inhibitors. So, considering the overall situation meticulously is extremely important to gauge the effect on the company in the long run.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 480 350
No. of Characters: 2316 1500
No. of Different Words: 239 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.681 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.825 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.718 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 160 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 126 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 68 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.862 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.625 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.268 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.268 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.09 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 107, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'monitor'
Suggestion: monitor
...from wasting time on the job. But, will monitoring their Internet activity stop the employ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, furthermore, hence, if, may, similarly, so, well, while, in conclusion, in fact, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 44.0 28.8173652695 153% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 55.5748502994 110% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 16.3942115768 43% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2392.0 2260.96107784 106% => OK
No of words: 478.0 441.139720559 108% => OK
Chars per words: 5.00418410042 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67581127817 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84268065975 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 243.0 204.123752495 119% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.508368200837 0.468620217663 108% => OK
syllable_count: 741.6 705.55239521 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 19.7664670659 121% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 54.1256254775 57.8364921388 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.6666666667 119.503703932 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.9166666667 23.324526521 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.66666666667 5.70786347227 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.287316085033 0.218282227539 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0784705896765 0.0743258471296 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.119755864979 0.0701772020484 171% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.156397575716 0.128457276422 122% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.105839765245 0.0628817314937 168% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 14.3799401198 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.72 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.05 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 98.500998004 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.