Prompt: “’The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.’ Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you

Essay topics:

Prompt: “’The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.’ Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.”

It is well-known that young people compromise that vast majority among the caltural groups in most of the countries. Youth as well are the future of the development in the variety of fields, so, huge efforts should be directed towards empowering their attitudes and preparing them to be able to face any upcoming issues. But in fact, it is veru contentious to consider this preparation environment whether to focus on being cooperative or competitive. Personally, I definitly agree that young people should consentrate on treating others as mates rather than competitors.

First of all, the sense of cooperation creates a further sense of responsibility towards problem solving and its effect on the countries they belong to or serve in. To illustrate, company X where employees work together as a family would direct their efforts towards creating the best product for the sake of perfection and would also distribute the duties to make sure everyone does his certain job completely. While company B where empolyees work under competition would face really hard times when requiring a cooperation to solve a specific obsticle, because each one of the employees would think seperatly and this would not lead to a collective strong desicion as a result.

Additionally, cooperation and teamwork does indeed makes a great apportunity for a comfortable atmosphere to arise. After all, when love exists, the levels of eagerness to work surge. For example, in an experimental study conducted in Jordan during the previous 5 years, results have shown a strong positive relationship between the satisfication workers in 35 different companies in the field of industry, and the levels of success.

To sum up, some people think that it is better to train young people to work under cooperative conditions and others believe that instilling them in competition attitudes is better. I believe that no matter how competitive the fields of industry and leadership in any given country, it is better to instill the sense of teamwork and cooperation in our future leaders and workers, since cooperation creates a good sense of responsibility and the perfect working atmosphere to work in, while the feelings of competitions creates a charged atmospheres and a less sense of responsibility instead.

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Average: 5 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 52, Rule ID: DOES_X_HAS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'make'? As 'do' is already inflected, the verb cannot also be inflected.
Suggestion: make
...y, cooperation and teamwork does indeed makes a great apportunity for a comfortable a...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, really, so, still, well, while, after all, for example, in fact, as a result, first of all, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 19.5258426966 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 14.8657303371 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 22.0 33.0505617978 67% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 58.6224719101 96% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 12.9106741573 93% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1925.0 2235.4752809 86% => OK
No of words: 366.0 442.535393258 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.25956284153 5.05705443957 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37391431897 4.55969084622 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.03719096367 2.79657885939 109% => OK
Unique words: 210.0 215.323595506 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.573770491803 0.4932671777 116% => OK
syllable_count: 604.8 704.065955056 86% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.10617977528 193% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 20.2370786517 59% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 30.0 23.0359550562 130% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 89.7816409716 60.3974514979 149% => OK
Chars per sentence: 160.416666667 118.986275619 135% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.5 23.4991977007 130% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.25 5.21951772744 196% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 10.2758426966 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.13791314769 0.243740707755 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0491043208955 0.0831039109588 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0314363302816 0.0758088955206 41% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0786471498457 0.150359130593 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0245314201351 0.0667264976115 37% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.6 14.1392134831 132% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 32.57 48.8420337079 67% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 16.2 12.1743820225 133% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.82 12.1639044944 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.35 8.38706741573 111% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 100.480337079 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.5 11.8971910112 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.0 11.2143820225 125% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.7820224719 119% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.