Do you agree or disagree?
The extended family (grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles) is less important now than it was in the past.
Even though many psychologists and some of the people argue as if it is a general truth that todays, people have close communication with distant relatives as well as the past, I firmly recommend that the extended families don’t have a significant role in people’s life. In modern world and complex technology, people don’t have enough time for distant family. In addition, influence of this people have an imperfect results on ways of life. And believe it or not, distant family claim that they know everything and people should permit them effect on their decisions. I will elaborate my idea with some significant reasons in the following paragraphs.
One of the meaningful reasons coming to my mind at first is that when people have various problems and economic issues, they will not have much time to spend with other people who are around them such as uncles and aunts. As a matter of fact, by extended media and novel equipment, people have to learn these technics and improving them, therefore, they are bustling and often forget their extended family. An example to illustrate this concepts, in the past, I used to taking parties, celebrities, and also go shopping with my cousins, but new I accept in a large company that its computers have enormous problems and I always have a lot of challenges to solve them, thus, I can’t meet this people. As you can see, this people might be more important in our life but we don’t enough time to spend for them.
Another remarkable reason is that if distant relatives have a great behavior by other members of family, they will be more important and everybody love them. In fact, extended family want to influence and make decision for others and they thoughts’ related to the past and new generation cannot accept them. As a personal experience, my aunt is a self-satisfied person who believes we should take some advice of her and follow her opinion. Never have I seen this kind of person in my life, then I cut my relationship with her and now I am relax. This experience thought me when we have less communication by distant family, we are more comfortable.
As a result, in the past, people had a simple life and they were happy than now. Not only do people are more busy rather than past, but also they prefer to have less connection and reduce impact of extended family on their life. As for as I am concerned, I prefer to decrease my conjunction by my aunts due to I don’t have much time and also this way is more useful for me.
- TPO 23 Integrated Writing Task 63
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries. 71
- integrated essay tpo 42 76
- integrated essay TPO18 80
- Do you agree or disagree? The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainments and athletics, are more important to younger people than they are to older people. 76
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 36, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
Even though many psychologists and some of the people argue as if it is a general trut...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 403, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...stant family. In addition, influence of this people have an imperfect results on way...
^^^^
Line 2, column 432, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...tended family. An example to illustrate this concepts, in the past, I used to taking...
^^^^
Line 2, column 692, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
... to solve them, thus, I can't meet this people. As you can see, this people mig...
^^^^
Line 3, column 544, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'relaxed'.
Suggestion: relaxed
...t my relationship with her and now I am relax. This experience thought me when we hav...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, so, then, therefore, thus, well, as for, in addition, in fact, kind of, such as, as a matter of fact, as a result, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 24.0 13.8261648746 174% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 65.0 43.0788530466 151% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2087.0 1977.66487455 106% => OK
No of words: 442.0 407.700716846 108% => OK
Chars per words: 4.72171945701 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58517132086 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6767727403 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 217.0 212.727598566 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.490950226244 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 669.6 618.680645161 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 63.607468387 48.9658058833 130% => OK
Chars per sentence: 122.764705882 100.406767564 122% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0 20.6045352989 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.64705882353 5.45110844103 159% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.13194338917 0.236089414692 56% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0501259270548 0.076458572812 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0503769023035 0.0737576698707 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0959299679559 0.150856017488 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.049176115428 0.0645574589148 76% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 11.7677419355 117% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.55 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.39 10.9000537634 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.82 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 86.8835125448 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.