the extended family is now less important than it was in the past.
Today it is popular to believe that the extended family, such as grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles, is not as important as the past. I strongly agree with this notion, but it doesn’t mean they did not play a big role in our life. With the development of the society, it is the transition from collectivism to individualism and the development of the technology that contributes to decrease the importance of the extended family in our life.
When recalling the evolution of human society, it is from the form of the tribe to a big family and now it is more likely to live in a relatively smaller family, which only includes parents and kids. At the same time, people immigrated from the countryside to the city, which requires much more independence than before because of the pressure of the high living cost. Nowadays, employers tend to require that employees work longer working hours to earn a living in this competitive world. On top that, people not only want to earn a living but also work for a ‘better’ life. So, people pay much more attention to themselves than ever before. Now people have less time to spend with their family, let alone the extended family.
Perhaps another reason is the development of technology which provides convenient transportation and connection with others. At these days, it is quite common for people to immigrate to another city or even another country because of work, study or something else. It could increase the physical distance between people and their extended family. What’s more, the mental distance has a significant increase because of the internet. It is far way easier to find someone who shares the same interests and value online and the generation gap might cause extended family don’t understand each other easily. So, the interaction with extended family decreased comparing with the past and thus they are less important nowadays.
In conclusion, extended family tend to be less important than before because of the transition of society and the physical and mental distances caused by technology.
- It is better to have broad knowledge of many academic subjects to specialize in one specific subject. 60
- Some people say that the Internet provides people with a lot of valuable information. Others think access to much information creates problems. Which view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 70
- It is better to have broad knowledge of many academic subjects to specialize in one specific subject. 60
- the extended family is now less important than it was in the past. 70
- Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them 60
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 560, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...want to earn a living but also work for a 'better' life. So, people pay...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, so, thus, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 9.8082437276 20% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 43.0788530466 53% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.0752688172 186% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1757.0 1977.66487455 89% => OK
No of words: 345.0 407.700716846 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.09275362319 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3097767484 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85751532364 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 182.0 212.727598566 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.527536231884 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 563.4 618.680645161 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.3364500165 48.9658058833 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.8125 100.406767564 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.5625 20.6045352989 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.9375 5.45110844103 54% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.274310321072 0.236089414692 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0872807678438 0.076458572812 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0960530951749 0.0737576698707 130% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.186708450864 0.150856017488 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0585869981467 0.0645574589148 91% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 11.7677419355 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.24 10.9000537634 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.11 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 75.0 86.8835125448 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 10.002688172 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.