Some say that because many people are living much longer the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably To what extent do you agree or disagree

Essay topics:

Some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the contemporary era, the average mortality rate has been decreased significantly. However many people have a long life span than earlier, therefore their age of retirement period from their work should be increased. In this essay I completely accord with the aforementioned statement and shall accumulate reasonable arguments with pertinent illustrations.
To commence with, nowadays because of the advancement in the medical and health care sector people maintain their health in a well organized manner, hence they prevent their health form illness and enjoy a long life. Moreover, their aggravated involvement in maintain a balanced diet and keeping up their fitness has also leads to long life. For instance, Chinese population has the high level of living rate compared to other countries population, whereas their food habit is considered as one of the best diet in the world. In addition, they also involve in a plethora of physical activities in their day to day life which makes them more active.
At the same time, some people argued that the age of retirement should also be raised fairly, in order to have a well balanced prosperous life. However, many governments have come forward to increase the retirement age of their working force, considerable with high level of job roles. To exemplify, Japan is one of the leading country in the production of automobile sector, where it has a strong labour law which make them to work for their entire life time. Subsequently, their health is also cared by the companies with the help of health insurance facilities.
In conclusion, the government and the companies should take proper measures to look after their companies senior employees by extending their retirement age. Therefore, it bolsters them to lead a healthy and wealthy life.

Votes
Average: 7.8 (1 vote)
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Essays by user mjjaswanth :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 87, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
... rate has been decreased significantly. However many people have a long life span than ...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 428, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'countries'' or 'country's'?
Suggestion: countries'; country's
... level of living rate compared to other countries population, whereas their food habit is...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 450, Rule ID: LIFE_TIME[1]
Message: Did you mean 'lifetime'?
Suggestion: lifetime
...hich make them to work for their entire life time. Subsequently, their health is also car...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 222, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...hem to lead a healthy and wealthy life.
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, hence, however, if, look, moreover, so, therefore, well, whereas, for instance, in addition, in conclusion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 13.1623246493 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 10.4138276553 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 4.0 7.30460921844 55% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 23.0 24.0651302605 96% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 41.998997996 105% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.3376753507 180% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1515.0 1615.20841683 94% => OK
No of words: 291.0 315.596192385 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.20618556701 5.12529762239 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.13022058845 4.20363070211 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82685266605 2.80592935109 101% => OK
Unique words: 167.0 176.041082164 95% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.573883161512 0.561755894193 102% => OK
syllable_count: 480.6 506.74238477 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.76152304609 168% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 16.0721442886 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.1522592999 49.4020404114 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.538461538 106.682146367 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.3846153846 20.7667163134 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.61538461538 7.06120827912 122% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.01903807615 80% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.67935871743 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.16916023573 0.244688304435 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.063422127874 0.084324248473 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0842479418338 0.0667982634062 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.114093634462 0.151304729494 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0648296134355 0.056905535591 114% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.3 13.0946893788 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.69 50.2224549098 81% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 11.3001002004 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.23 12.4159519038 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.23 8.58950901804 107% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 78.4519038076 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.5 9.78957915832 128% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.7795591182 121% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.