Analytical Writing Assessment Question
People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
People's behavior are largely determined by forces not of their own making. This may be absolutely true for someone who does not know how to put their own stand and the ones who have a very weak decision making power and is often infunced by the sayings of people even if its not in their favour, instead of believing on their own potential and hard work.
But someone who is strong minded and determined, someone who has a firm foundation of their thought processes and the ones who are often refered to as the revolutionizers, this statement is anything but true.
People are often put down by negative criticism and thus usually change their paths and always move in those conventional routes. But this is not always the case, there are several examples from india and abroad which clearly demonstrates that even with negative criticism the strong headed people are rarely distracted, Moreover even negative criticism provides them with nothing but motivation.
Before India became a nuclear super power, the whole world was collaborating to stop india from testing its nuclear power in pokhran. Mockingly and with suitable actions, USA tried everything to stop india from the nuclear test in pokhran. There were a lot of internal political tensions as well, even the leaders were under pressure to stop the pokhran test by hook or by crook. But despite of all these external forces, the team of the engineers and scientists never allowed all these external forces to determine their behaviour, actions and mind set.
Ignoring all these factors like they dont exist, the team tested the nuclear power in pokhran and achieved success in their first attempt. Once they acieved success then it was sufficient to be an idol for the fact that people's behavior are not determined by external forces but are determined by their own decisions.
Moving on, when india was about to launch their first satellite, their were lot of international powers and organisations who undermined and doubted the capabilities of the indian scientists. But despite of all the negative reviews, with no proper launching location and proper guidance, india did launch its first satellite, carrying it in a cycle and launched it from a field. The limited resources and others views of doubt and criticism never became a hurdle soo huge to stop the determined scientist from achieving success. It is evident from this fact that others opinions and factors never become a stoping barrier for the strong minded.
All these examples are not only limited to india, when Elon musk first talked about the self driving cars he was hugely mocked and chastised. But he never allowed these views and unasked opinions to stop him from achieving what he desired.
All these factors are enough to show that people's behavior is not largely determined by forces not of their own making. Rather its their own thought process which guides them through all the ups and downs that come along the way.
But some time, I agree that external factors are so strong that they handicap you form becoming the driver of your own work. But one should always focus on their own making rather then being influenced by what people say.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2024-01-05 | jenas | 50 | view |
2023-10-29 | raghavchauhan619 | 66 | view |
2023-09-08 | Bidusik47 | 66 | view |
2023-09-04 | Sagar1234567890 | 50 | view |
2023-08-03 | KalyaniHarbola | 66 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 354, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...racted, Moreover even negative criticism provides them with nothing but motivatio...
^^
Line 7, column 38, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
... Ignoring all these factors like they dont exist, the team tested the nuclear powe...
^^^^
Line 12, column 121, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Rather,
...ined by forces not of their own making. Rather its their own thought process which gui...
^^^^^^
Line 12, column 128, Rule ID: IT_IS[17]
Message: Did you mean 'it's' (='it is') instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
Suggestion: it's; it is
... forces not of their own making. Rather its their own thought process which guides ...
^^^
Line 14, column 181, Rule ID: RATHER_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'than'? 'than' is used for comparisons, 'then' is an expression of time.
Suggestion: than
...always focus on their own making rather then being influenced by what people say.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, may, moreover, so, then, thus, well
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.5258426966 133% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 12.4196629213 16% => OK
Conjunction : 33.0 14.8657303371 222% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.3162921348 150% => OK
Pronoun: 52.0 33.0505617978 157% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 65.0 58.6224719101 111% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 12.9106741573 39% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2660.0 2235.4752809 119% => OK
No of words: 537.0 442.535393258 121% => OK
Chars per words: 4.95344506518 5.05705443957 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.81386128306 4.55969084622 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.44802828903 2.79657885939 88% => OK
Unique words: 252.0 215.323595506 117% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.469273743017 0.4932671777 95% => OK
syllable_count: 815.4 704.065955056 116% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.77640449438 394% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.2370786517 104% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 23.0359550562 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.1796130509 60.3974514979 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.666666667 118.986275619 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.5714285714 23.4991977007 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.42857142857 5.21951772744 47% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 9.0 4.97078651685 181% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 5.0 7.80617977528 64% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 10.2758426966 58% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 5.13820224719 234% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.193241887734 0.243740707755 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0689216440332 0.0831039109588 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0755763838098 0.0758088955206 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0960399942252 0.150359130593 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0698961262792 0.0667264976115 105% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 14.1392134831 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.56 48.8420337079 112% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.1743820225 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.73 12.1639044944 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.4 8.38706741573 100% => OK
difficult_words: 120.0 100.480337079 119% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 11.8971910112 151% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.2143820225 107% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.