Q10 Development in technology causes environmental problems Some people believe the solution in these problems is everyone accepts a simpler way of life while others say that technology can solve these problems Discuss both views and give your opinion 405

Essay topics:

Q10 : Development in technology causes environmental problems. Some people believe the solution in these problems is everyone accepts a simpler way of life, while others say that technology can solve these problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

​(줄인건데도 405자 ㅠㅠ)

​Recently, the question of how to deal with environmental issues has become the subject of heated debate. Some people assert that the development of technology enables humans to handle environmental problems, while others argue otherwise. Personally, I wholeheartedly agree with the former stance. In the following essay, both views will be discussed before a conclusion is reached with my opinion.

On the one hand, those who claim that having a simpler way of life alleviates the level of environmental concerns do so for several reasons. Proponents of this argument insist that with the advent of personal vehicles, a multitude of individuals own cars, operated by fossil fuels, emitting a huge amount of CO2, which leads to air pollution as well as climate change. This exerts a detrimental influence on the quality of people's lives. In addition, numerous goods made of non-disposable plastic are used by a multitude of people pursuing convenience, posing a threat to the environment. Given these points, some people hold the view that changing our lifestyle into a simpler way, such as avoiding using plastic bags and commuting to and from work by public transport, makes it possible for mankind to ease these environmental problems.

​My opinion, however, is that human beings should make use of technology in order to resolve contemporary issues related to the environment. Perhaps the most compelling reason is that in this technologically advanced era, a great number of companies invest vast sums of money in developing the way to utilise renewable energy, including electricity, lessening environmental degradation. As a brief illustration, Tesla which is the most notable firm in the field of the automobile industry could release cars using electricity as an energy source in the market owing to technological progress. These cars are able to ameliorate the quality of air given that they do not generate carbon dioxide. Furthermore, the majority of developed countries across the globe have a predisposition to convert thermal power plants into other plants that are run by alternative energy, such as wind power and solar power, with the help of up-to-date technology. In light of the above, I find these more persuasive.

In conclusion, it is undeniable that there are a variety of opinions about this topic. However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, I fully support the view that developments in technology can help people devise solutions to environmental problems for the reasons discussed above.

Votes
Average: 8.4 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 9, column 127, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a careful manner" with adverb for "careful"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, I fully support the view that developm...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
furthermore, however, if, so, well, while, in addition, in conclusion, such as, as well as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 13.1623246493 84% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 7.85571142285 64% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 10.4138276553 38% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 14.0 7.30460921844 192% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 24.0651302605 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 71.0 41.998997996 169% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 8.3376753507 168% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2367.0 1615.20841683 147% => OK
No of words: 441.0 315.596192385 140% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.36734693878 5.12529762239 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58257569496 4.20363070211 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.06491618584 2.80592935109 109% => OK
Unique words: 260.0 176.041082164 148% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.589569160998 0.561755894193 105% => OK
syllable_count: 763.2 506.74238477 151% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 4.0 2.52805611222 158% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.10420841683 190% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.76152304609 147% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 16.0721442886 124% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 68.6376536604 49.4020404114 139% => OK
Chars per sentence: 118.35 106.682146367 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.05 20.7667163134 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.5 7.06120827912 64% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.67935871743 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 3.4128256513 205% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.459339527544 0.244688304435 188% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.125947870703 0.084324248473 149% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.1556654942 0.0667982634062 233% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.304177844831 0.151304729494 201% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.277383227636 0.056905535591 487% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 13.0946893788 114% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.69 50.2224549098 81% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 11.3001002004 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.87 12.4159519038 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.35 8.58950901804 109% => OK
difficult_words: 129.0 78.4519038076 164% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 9.78957915832 77% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.